


Running out of reasons

by AlphaWolf_x



Category: The Heroes of Olympus - Rick Riordan
Genre: Boyfriends, Friendship, M/M, Recovery, Self-Harm, Suicide Attempt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-05-02
Updated: 2015-08-14
Packaged: 2018-03-28 18:10:51
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 16
Words: 26,078
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3864733
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AlphaWolf_x/pseuds/AlphaWolf_x
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Nico di Angelo is tired of life and decided to end it.<br/>But there's people who want to keep him close to them. <br/>They can save him from danger, but can they save him from himself?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Everything I loved, became everything I lost.

**Author's Note:**

> I'm gonna try to post as much as I can! Exams are on just now so it will be a slow few weeks but I will defiantly finish it!  
> Reviews are awesome so leave you're opinions, good/bad. (:

Nico took a breath, mentally reciting his day. The son of Apollo showed such an interest in Nico that it scared him. You let people close to you and they get hurt. Nico was poison to anyone who chose to be near him. He wasn’t even supposed to be in this century. He was a mistake.

When he looked in the mirror it was not just his own, dark, tired face he saw. On his left was his sister, his mother was on his right. They both looked at him with sad tired eyes, disappointed in how much he had fucked up. He should have been the one to die, not Bianca. Everything would have worked out better that way. Hazel would have loved Bianca. His mother put a hand on his shoulder, but when away from the mirror it was just air. Bianca began to cry.

In one swift motion Nico punched the mirror, his mother and sister disappeared.

Glass. On the floor, in pieces. Shining, enticing.

He picked up a shard of glass and twisted it between two fingers. It wasn’t a hard decision, it was his best solution.

He dragged the shard of glass across his right wrist, dark red flowing over the wound, staining his arm. He done the same to his left wrist, hands bloodied and shaking.

It was a pleasant sting, which Nico thought was weird, wounds were supposed to hurt but he supposed this wasn’t a normal wound, it was his closed door finally taking him in and saving everyone from him.

He gently threw himself onto the floor as his legs became to weaken. Glass spiked his hand where he let it lay, but once again it was a pleasant sting, a realising sting. He wondered how long he’d have left, wondered if he would see Bianca and his mother again, wondered if his father would still visit him. Wondered who would find him dead. Wondered if Will…

Nico flinched as someone knocked at the Hades Cabin door. He stayed silent, hoping however it was would leave him for an hour or two, he didn’t know how long he needed. He began to cry as the door opened, “Nico?” Jason yelled.  “Where are you? The camp fires already started, we were wondering-” He stopped speaking when he entered the bathroom. He threw a hand up to his mouth, disgusted by the mess of the broken boy. Nico cried harder.

“Go away” He begged but the older boy didn’t listen. He kneeled on the floor beside Nico and reached for his wrists. The son of Hades yanked his hands back with a feral look on his tear stained face.

“Nico! Let me see them. Please!” Jason pleaded, tears running down behind his glasses. Nico gave up his fight and didn’t resit when Jason gently held his wrists. “Oh no, oh no, oh no” The older boy chanted in a soft voice. He grabbed a towel and soaked it under the tap before placing it on top of the younger boys cuts. The pain came screaming to Nico, he screamed. “Shh, shh, brother. It’s okay, you’re okay” Jason told him in a soothing voice.

“It’s not okay” Nico whispered.

Jason looked him in the eye and said “It will be”

“Just leave me!” Nico yelled.

“No! Listen to me, I’m not letting you go! Do you know how many people were worried when you didn’t show up to the camp fire, almost everyone Nico! All these people who would be destroyed if you were gone!” Jason snapped as he softly cleaned the wounds. “I would miss you, okay!”

“It’s better if I’m gone” Nico cried.

“No. No it’s not. You’re not going anywhere okay. Please” Jason begged him.

Nico never answered, he just stared at his wrists. His blue veins were livid, the red swimming down his arm. Why was blood red if veins where blue?

“Nico!” Jason yelled. Nico turned his head to look at Jason, surprised to see two Jason’s. He never knew Jason had a twin, it was strange.

Two Jason’s turned in to roughly about four, Nico couldn’t tell. Where had the Jason’s come from?

Many Jason’s leaped at Nico but only two arms shook him. Shook him into the darkness.

* * *

 

“When will he wake up?!” A distressed voice whispered loudly.

“Soon. Just give him some breathing room” A softer voice assured the other.

“All he’s had is breathing room, that’s what got him here” The first voice mumbled in a sad tone.

Nico opened his eyes slowly, and then closed them when the light attacked him. He timidly blinked a few times before keeping his eyes open. Two pairs of eyes stared at him, widely and watery. Jason Grace and Will Solace.

Jason pounced forward, pulling Nico into a tight hug. In doing so he reminded Nico of what had happened last night. He stiffened in the hug but if Jason noticed he never gave it away. “Don’t you ever scare me like that again” Jason ordered as he pulled away. He sounded like a Mother whose child had ran away for a day in a tantrum. Nico couldn’t pinpoint the exact moment Jason started to act like his Mother Hen but he knew it had already been too long.

Nico looked at his wrists, both of them cocooned in a white bandage, and cast a feeble glance at Will Solace. The boy who was usually filled with sunshine and liveliness wasn’t there, this boy looked like someone had taken his sunshine away, and his hair was even a shade darker. Nico knew that the snug wrapping around his ruined wrists were the work of an Apollo camper. He gave Jason a look of betrayal before sinking deeper into the bed he was lying in.

“I had to Nico” Jason murmured, eyes staring at him like a kicked puppy.

“Nico, I’m not going to tell anyone. You can trust me” Will said in a soothing voice, walking closer to Nico. He reached out a hand as if to touch the younger boy but as Nico began to literally sink into the shadows he yanked his hand back. “No! You’re not well enough to even think about shadow travel!” Will yelled.

“Leave me alone” Nico replied, but he stayed in the room.

“Nico, the reason you’re here is because you were alone” Jason told him and sat on the edge of his bed.

“You can’t keep pushing people away” Will added and bit his lip. He had tears in the corner of his eyes that he violently wiped away.

“I can do what I want” Nico said in a dismissive tone. He should have barricaded the door, locked himself in the bathroom. He was stupid, careless. And still alive.

“I will tie myself to you death boy! You are staying here and that’s final!” The son of Apollo suddenly yelled. Nico flinched out of shock, as did Jason. Will had never looked so dark and gloomy, Nico thought his face must hurt from being pulled out of a smile.

“Why?!” Nico sat up and yelled back. Will flinched but held his ground, looking at Nico intimidatingly. “I should have died years ago. Years ago! I’m only alive now because of a mistake, I should already be dead so why not just do the job myself!” He  screamed, ripping the bandaged off of his wrists.

“Because you have friends. People who care about you!” Jason barked at Nico, a fierce determination in his eyes. All Nico heard was lies. They’d give up eventually he thought. And then he could finish the job.

"You need help, Nico. You need to listen to your friends" Will told him, a gentler tone than before. When Nico never answered he calmly said “You need those wrapped up”, nodding towards his wrist.

Two neat vertical slits should have worked, it would have worked. Now they were stitched up and already healing. A thin line of blood ran down the side of Nico’s arm, he stared at it.

 Flesh, blood, stitches. Alive. He took a deep breathe, still studying the wounds, and searched his brain for any kind of sign that this is how it should be. Flesh, blood, stitches. Alive.

Should he be allowed to live?

There was nothing he could to do bring Bianca back, would she want him to have a life?

Would Hazel miss him?

These people that portray themselves as Nico’s _friends_ , are they real?

Jason and Will looked at each other, subtly trying to ask the other what they were supposed to do.

Finally, Nico held his wrist out to Will and said “Fine, bandage it”

But inside he said, “I’ll try”


	2. My Heart Is A Ghost Town

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Can Nico handle the pressure of getting better?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay guys, that's my exams over so I should be posting more frequently!

“You are my sunshine, my only sunshine. You make me happy, when skies are grey” Nico di Angelo could think of many horrible ways to wake up. Surrounded by Drakons, buried six feet under. But the current scene happening in front of his bed was his worst nightmare. Will Solace had made himself Nico’s pit-bull, furiously following him everywhere, never leaving him alone, keeping him out of harm’s way. Nico could just about put up with it, but Will had gone too far this time.

“SHUT UP SOLACE!” He yelled and threw the closest pillow to him at the Son of Apollo. He used the two remaining pillows to act as headphones. 

“Singing is the best medicine!” Will grinned.

“Not your singing” Nico grumbled.

“I don’t think I know what you mean” Will gasped and belted out some more singing.

“If you stop now I’ll get up and we can get some breakfast” Nico groaned, cursing the light that shone into his eyes. Nico had black curtains, by simple logic the light should not be able to pass the curtains and attack his eyes. As much as Nico hated the light, he admired the way it could pass the darkness without being changed. Kind of like Will really.

“Okay!” Will grinned enthusiastically.

Nico pulled himself out of his coffin bed, cursing in Italian. Will tilted his head at Nico like he always did when Nico spoke Italian, bewildered and intrigued like a dog hearing a phone call.

“You’ll need to wait outside while I change” Nico told him.

“Or you can change in the bathroom?” Will asked, once again tilting his head like a dog. Not one of those ludicrous dogs with their tongues sticking out their mouths more than in and their tails on constant swing, much more like an elegant golden retriever, smart and striking.

“Y-yeah…okay” Nico stuttered and bundled his clothes into his hands, taking them into the bathroom.

 He had gone to great lengths to not go into the bathroom since the accident. ‘Accident’ is what Jason and Will call it whenever it’s mentioned; it’s absurd really because it was quite the opposite of accident. His fist didn’t accidently fly into the mirror, his hands didn’t accidently take a piece of the glass and plunge it into his skin. He done it of his own will and believed in it.

Glass on the floor. Shining, enticing. Blood coming from his wrist. Blue veins, red blood, why was that?

He knew that it wasn’t happening again, he knew it was his imagination. But he wanted it, he wanted it all to happen again, but with the more final ending this time.

“Nico? Vámonos” Will yelled.

“That’s Spanish, not Italian, by the way” Nico yelled back and shook his head as if by doing that the memories and desires would fly away.

“Oh” Will muttered.

Nico took one last look at the mirror and the floor, the glass and the blood where transparent but he knew they were still there; the memory was still there; the almost but never was, still there on his bathroom floor.

He rapidly pulled a tshirt over his head and slipped into his jeans. They were loose and baggy, as was his tshirt. He lifted it up and was greeted by the sight of his ribs sticking out of his pale skin slightly.

He dropped the tshirt down in disgust before opening the door.

“Let’s go death boy!” Will grinned upon seeing him. He had a grin glued to his face. It was always there without fail. Happy, sunny Will Solace didn’t fit in the jigsaw puzzle of dark, depressing Nico di Angelo, really.

“Don’t call me that” Nico grumbled, making his way out of his cabin. Will nudged his shoulder, creating a small nudge war between the two.

“Hey guys!” A voice yelled happily as they made their way to the dinner hall.

The boys looked up to see a grinning Piper, Jason in tow. Nico blushed and stepped away from Will, not too much to be noticed he had thought, but Will sighed.

“Hey” Nico mumbled.

“You on your way to breakfast?” Jason asked. Nico and Will nodded. “Great so are we!”

Will walked ahead with Jason, their heads pulled together, whispering. About Nico probably.

“How you been?” Piper asked, smiling at Nico.

“Uh, good I guess. You?” He asked her back, looking at the ground as he stepped on it.

“As good as I can be. Seriously though Nico, how are you?” She asked him again. He looked up at her this time and raised an eyebrow. “It’s just you don’t look good” She trailed off.

“Gee thanks”

“No! I don’t mean…it’s just…” She pulled on one of her braids nervously. “You’re just so skinny and pale” She told him.

“Im always skinny and pale” He shrugged.

“Well, yeah I guess. But now everything’s going back to normal maybe you could try to you know, eat more” She suggested and swung her arms. She had a little spring in her steps that Nico characterized with Children of Aphrodite, it was a cutesy kind of jumpy thing.

“Yeah, maybe” he mumbled, hoping to end the conversation.

* * *

 

“Nico eat it!” They yelled.

Will on one side, Jason and Piper in front of him, voices attacking him from all directions.

“I said I wasn’t hungry” He told them and shrugged his shoulders.

“You’re fading away!” Jason exclaimed and moved the plate of food closer to the son of hades.

“I don’t care okay!” Nico yelled and slammed his fist on the table.

“Nico?” Piper asked voice small and shaky.

“What?” he turned to her. Her eyes were wide, pupils strangely dilated. She was the strongest Daughter of Aphrodite Nico had met since Silena Beauregard, he couldn’t pinpoint any other moment where Piper looked this haunted.

“What is that” She asked him, almost whispered to him. Will and Jason looked at each other panicky.

“What’s what Piper?” Nico snapped, tired of the scared look she was giving him. He was the Son of Hades, he was used to these looks but not from the people he was beginning to think of friends. One step forward, two steps back,

“On your wrist” She told him, in a firmer tone but used soft hands as she took his wrist into the both of her hands and dragged her finger across a pink fleshy scar.

Ambrosia and Apollo skills where good, but scars were inevitable.

“It’s nothing” He said and yanked his hand back, knocking over his drink in the process. A loud clank silenced the whole dining hall and everyone turned to him. Self-consciously he pulled his sleeves over his wrists as far as he could.

When in danger rats freeze briefly before retreating to safety. That’s exactly what Nico done.

The few seconds he stood up, frozen, seemed like hours. All eyes on him, confused eyes, bored eyes, concerned eyes, eyes of unreadable emotions. Then he made the decision of retreat. He ran straight out of the hall, not stopping to make up an excuse.

He ran, he didn’t know where he was running, but he ran.

Left foot, right foot. Swing the arms for extra speed, for balance. Remember to breathe, in out, out in. Never stop, stopping ends the retreat. Stopping means people. People means speaking. Speaking means danger.

Have you ever ran so fast that your surroundings blur and you don’t know where you are. Have you ever ran so fast that you run straight into freezing cold water that sends a shock up your body and numbs your senses.

Have you ever been so numb that you don’t care?

The water was cold and then it wasn’t, because the water was nothing when he was so numb. He thought he was shaking, but he wasn’t sure. Was he floating or drowning? He didn’t care.

The cold bit him, he could feel it but at the same time he couldn’t feel anything.

It was a strange feeling.

A numb ending was best, he thought to himself as he gently closed his eyes, letting the numbness take over everything.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Feedback encourages me to write faster!


	3. We are numb, free and young and we can feel none of it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I won a poetry competition and it made me so happy!  
> Anyway here's chapter three!

Your eyes are black, your mind is black. Everything’s black. You can’t see.

But you can hear.

They’re concerned, they’re always concerned. You make them concerned.

You can’t tell how many voices there is but it’s more than there should be. More than you wanted there to be.

You’re still cold, freezing, but you feel warmth attacking you. You're head is laying on someone, you feel arms around you as well, you don’t know if you like it or not.

* * *

 

Will Solace was an amazing healer, he could work in hazardous conditions and come out on top. But when faced with a freezing to death, blue skinned unconscious boy that he’d gotten so captivated by all he could do was lay on the cold ground, cry and desperately try to warm him up.

 “We have to get Chiron!” Piper yelled as she and Jason took of their jackets and wrapped them around Nico.

“I don’t think he’d of wanted that” Percy mumbled. He and Annabeth had spotted them chasing Nico out of the dinner hall and joined them, not listening to their objections that Nico was fine.

“Oh and you know what he’d want do you” Will sneered, rocking the boy in his arms back and forth.

“Will, calm down okay. We need you to tell us what to do” Jason pleaded and sat beside Nico and Jason, putting one hand on the unconscious boy and the other on the crying healer.

“He’s going to be okay, Will” Annabeth told him.

“Is he?” Will mumbled, defeat leaking from his voice. He wanted nothing more than to give the Son of Hades all the sunshine he deserved, but the boy could never see his worth, he was holding the weight of the past on his shoulders and wouldn’t allow anyone to help him. Will would do anything to help him. “Okay, we need to get him inside and get his wet clothes off him, try to warm him up” He told them. With Jason’s help the pulled Nico’s unconscious body up with them.

 “He’s so young” Piper muttered as she looked at him, her eyes watering. She hadn’t known Nico long and at first he scared her but the last few weeks in Camp Half Blood had shown her a different Nico. Jason had taken on the role of Nico’s big brother long ago and that had meant she spent a lot of time around Nico, he had created a settling atmosphere that she could never had expected. He didn’t deserve any of this pain, any of this disaster.

“We’re really not going to get help from an adult?” Annabeth exclaimed, throwing a hand through her hair.

“The only reason this happened was because Piper found out okay! He doesn’t want more people knowing, especially not adults” Jason yelled, shaking but still supporting Nico.

“What if he gets worse?” Annabeth asked.

“If he does…if he does get worse then we can tell someone else. But we give him a chance first” Will told them, tears streaming down his face faster than he thought possible. He looked down at his Nico, his pale face, freezing to touch. He’d never say it to the Son of Hades face but he was so beautiful, his usual olive skin tone and dark messy hair, he was more god than human.

“Okay, okay fine” Annabeth agreed. “Where do we take him?”

“His cabin, there’s no one else there” Percy suggested.

Everyone agreed.

It was easier than they expected to take an unconscious hypothermic boy into his cabin, no one had spotted them. They laid Nico on his large double bed that he'd recently upgraded from a coffin. When Will went to take Nico’s soaking wet clothes off Annabeth put her hands on his arms, stopping him. He looked at her confusedly and she saw the pain in his eyes. If only Nico could see it, if only he could see how much he meant to everyone in this room and so many others. That's all he really needed, she thought.

“Piper and I should do it. I think he’d prefer that” She told him. Will nodded and allowed himself to be guided outside the cabin by Jason and Percy, a haunted look on his face.

“I can’t…believe this” Piper whispered as the carefully took Nico’s shirt off. “I didn’t think things were this bad” She said and felt automatically ten times worse. She didn't think. She was to caught up in her own life after things went back to normal that she didn't even bother to ask him how he was, or check his daily food intake, or just help him. She was truly ashamed of what a bad friend she was.

“People rarely do” Annabeth said as she threw Nico’s wet tshirt to the ground. “He’s so skinny” She sighed as they both stared at Nico, his ribs and hip bones sticking out, malnourishment everywhere they looked. The two of them sucked in a breath as they could see fleshy scars, some old, some recent. They didn't say anything, they thought he at least deserved that.

The girls took all Nico's soaking clothes off except for his boxers, they had a feeling that was going too far and Nico wouldn't like it, even if they weren't bothered by it, he would be. They dressed him up in the warmest clothes they could find, including a red woolly Christmas jumper that must have been a gift because it was so unlike anything else Nico owned. Once they had finished they told the boys to come back in. Will went straight over to sit on the other side of the bed, taking Nico's hand in his and rubbing it, to keep him warm or just to show him that he cared.

“What are his chances of waking up soon…?” Percy whispered, grabbing Annabeth's hand, both of them seeking comfort.

“Typically you shouldn’t move someone with hypothermia, especially if they're unconscious but he wouldn’t have wanted anyone else to see…” Will drawled off. “We got his wet clothes off, put new ones on. We just need to warm him up. The best way to do it is with body heat from someone else…but I don’t think he’d like that” Will noted, scratching his head with his free hand.

“Screw what he’d like right now. What we’d all like is for him to wake up okay. That’s what’s needed!” Jason harshly exclaimed. Piper put a comforting hand on his shoulder but he shrugged it off. “Just take your shirt off and hug him, Solace” Jason ordered and gestured with his hands.

“Okay” Will murmured and done as he was told. As Will covered any visible skin on Nico with his, the cold bit into him. He fit Nico’s head into the crook of his neck and almost cried on the boy’s hair, it shouldn’t be like this. It shouldn’t be this hard.

“What now?” Annabeth asked.

“Does anyone have a hot water bottle?” Will asked.

“I do” Both Annabeth and Piper answered.

“Okay, get them and fill them up” Will ordered. They nodded and ran out of the Hades cabin together. “Jason will you go into my cabin and get some nectar please, also a thermometer. And Percy will you try to find something hot for Nico to eat or drink” Will asked.

“Sure” They said and ran out of the cabin, leaving Will alone with an unconscious Nico.

“You’re going to be okay. You’re going to be fine” Will said, it was supposed to be an order, but it was more like he was trying to convince himself. “You don’t get to disappear without saying goodbye. You don’t ever get to disappear again, death boy” He said, with a small smile. He placed a hand on the son of hades cheek and kissed his head. “You’re not leaving me, di Angelo. Not until you know how I feel about you” He promised and moved his hands up and down the boy as appropriately as he could, trying to warm him up. “Wake up please”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for all you're kind comments! I can't believe people are actually enjoying this!  
> This chapter was a little rushed, so sorry!  
> Please leave you're thoughts, good or bad. Really appreciated (:


	4. Like sunlight and rain, flooding through the veins.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The gang wait for Nico to wake up anxiously. Do they need the help of an adult or can they cope on they're own?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I haven't really proofread this... so sorry? I'm tired so here it is anyway!

“He’s not waking up! The deal was if he didn’t wake up soon we get an adult Will, I need to get Chiron!” Annabeth ordered, her grey eyes building up a storm. It had been exactly twelve minutes since they made the deal and Nico’s eye’s where still closed. He had jerked a few times, fluttered his eyes, every time he did the demi-gods would rush over to see him only to see it was just a natural reaction.

Will looked at the boy beside him, he looked like an angel, as his name would suggest. Without the barrier of bullshit and self-defence that wasn’t needed anymore he looked like any kid his age should. But underneath the appearance there was deep problems that Nico had kept all to himself and it landed him in this condition. Will knew that getting Chiron’s help was a good idea, the best idea probably, but he knew that would upset Nico. Will made a promise that he wouldn’t tell anyone and he wasn’t going to break it.

“Just…give me a minute okay!” Will yelled at Annabeth. He wasn’t a yeller, not in the slightest. He had watched his mother being yelled at by countless number of partners ever since he was old enough to walk. His mother had raised him to never raise his voice at anyone, but in particular people he cared about. Annabeth was his friend and deep down he felt a feeling in his stomach, like sharp claws dragging themselves around his stomach digging deeply and fiercely in and leaving a scar, because he knew he shouldn’t be yelling at her. But he couldn’t help it. Nico di Angelo brought out such a fierce bright flare in him, brighter than anything his father could ever create. He would never raise his voice to Nico, but he would raise it for him.

“We might not have a minute Will!” Annabeth argued, raising her voice back at him which seemed to be an effortless decision for her. Percy moved as if to put a hand on her shoulder but thought better of it and stepped back a little, as did the others.

“Who’s the doctor here?!” Will asked, even though he knew he wasn’t really a doctor. But he was the best they had. Doctors also dealt with mental help and he knew involving others would not help Nico’s mental health.

“None of us are!” Annabeth pointed out and stomped her foot, wild blonde curls falling over her eyes, blocking out the storm.

“Well, in this situation I am smarter!” He yelled and jerked a little out of anger, Nico’s head fell out from the crook of his neck and onto the pillow. As soon as he said it the room held a deafening silence. He wished he could take it back. You never tell a child of Athena that you’re smarter than them, its common sense. You especially never tell Annabeth Chase you’re smarter than her, it’s a death wish.

Percy shook his head as if to say “Now you’ve done it”.

“William!” Was all Annabeth shrieked. She opened her mouth, ready to attack him with a carefully laid out fully proofed rant when someone else spoke.

“That’s not even his name” Nico whispered, his eye lids still shut but his eyes moving beneath them. “It’s Willow” He added in a small weak voice, opening his eyes. Will would be angry, the son of hades had just given away his biggest most embarrassing secret, but how could he be angry when he was able to feel that bright flare again at the sight of a conscious Nico.

“It’s what. Oh my god’s” Percy laughed. Will moved himself back a little and was very aware that his bare skin was touching Nico’s and it was causing all different feelings.

“Not the time” Jason told his friend and crouched down beside Nico. “How you doing?” He whispered, in a voice similar to one uses with a feral dog. Piper walked forward and put a hand on Jason’s shoulder.

“Fine” Nico mumbled. “But…Will?” Nico asked, turning round to look at the Son of Apollo with a strange look on his face.

“Yes?” Will asked in a soft voice, leaning towards him.

“Are you naked?” He asked quietly.

“Only a little” Will said sheepishly, with a hot blush.

“And what am I wearing?” Nico asked and looked down at his bright festive jumper in disgust. It would have been a comical expression if in different circumstances; there was a massive difference between normal Nico and Nico who had just woken from unconsciousness. He seemed almost high on drugs that no one had given him.

“Warm clothing” Annabeth told him with a small smile.

“That’s…good” Nico murmured and snuggled into it.

“I can’t believe you gave away my secret” Will whispered to the boy, trying to keep the conversation light and ongoing. His hand brushed against Nico and before he could move it away, remembering the boy didn’t like to be touched, his hand was grabbed. He could feel his cheeks reddening, and couldn’t keep his lips together as a smile pushed its way out.

“I like you’re name” Nico whispered back before yawning.

“Are you tired?” Jason asked, ruffling’s the boys’ hair like an older brother would do. Nico gave a small humming noise of affection as he closed his eyes, his hand squeezing Will’s causing him to blush even more. How silly it is, he thought, to get such a rush off of one tiny move of affection, especially when the boy was clearly out of it.

“A little” Nico drawled.

“Can he sleep or is that bad?” Percy asked, looking up where a herd of small sparkly horses dangled from the ceiling, obviously one of Hazel’s decorations, quite unlike Nico’s decorations which involved posters of bands Will had never heard of and a few pictures Nico had taken when he was given a camera as a gift. No one knew that the Son of Hades was interested in photography but his pictures where likes stories, some where of nothing but everything at one, like a lonely river which shimmered and glistered but was a home for empty cans and bottles.  Will knew Percy was going to extreme lengths to avoid looking at Nico, as if if he didn’t see him then the situation wouldn’t be happening.

“He should be okay to sleep for a while” Will nodded. He reached for his tshirt and put it back on, not wanting to push his luck with Nico.

“Nico, do you mind if we stay here?” Annabeth asked and sat on Hazel’s vacant bed. Percy joined her.

“Mhhm, stay” He mumbled, drifting his sentence.

“Get some sleep little brother” Jason whispered to Nico and ruffled his hair again.

“Goodnight Bianca” Nico whispered just before his breath evened out.

The room was caught in a sharp silence once again. Eyes searched for eyes, waiting for someone to talk. Tear’s crept along the tear ducts, a few tears sailed down cheeks. The only noise was a symphony of uneven breathes, fast or slow someone breathed out or in every second.

Piper leaned over to press a kiss on Nico’s forehead, one of her tears sliding down to his cheek. The tear stayed there, Will thought of wiping it off but in the end left it. It was a beautiful sight and a haunting one at the same time. He knew Nico would of loved to take a picture of it if it was someone else.

Will moved himself to sit on top of Nico’s bed and covers but kept his right hand under. He brushed his thumb over the younger boys hand and willed all of his light, his heat and his happiness to soar into the boy who needed it the most, but was in a dangerous relationship with the darkness.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't know if I should continue with this...it's just not getting the ratings. Is it bad or good? I have no clue. It's so hard to judge your own work.  
> I have a few one shots I could do.  
> Tell me if you think I should stop or continue?


	5. I will try to fix you

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Will Solace was going to make his life hell, while trying to improve it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So sorry this chapter is going to suck so fucking bad?  
> I finish school next week though so I promise chapters will be a lot more thoughtful and laid out!  
> My best guess so far is that I'll have about 25 chapters? Maybe more.

When Nico woke up, properly woke up, his friends were all asleep. Annabeth and Percy were curled up together like little puppies on Hazel’s bed, Piper and Jason sat on the floor with their heads leaning on the bed- such an awkward and uncomfortable position that must be, Nico thought- and Will lay over the covers beside him, one hand over the covers and one under gently holding Nico’s hand.

He didn’t know how to feel about Wills hand in his. When Hazel held his hand he was overwhelmed by the comfort it brought him, but Hazel was different, he let Hazel in. Will seemed to push himself in, not that Nico secretly didn’t like the company. But Will’s hand in his felt different than it would if it was Hazel, it was a different kind of comfort.

Before he could decide if he liked it or not Will woke up and quickly took his hand away.

“Hey, Death boy” Will grinned. The others who were, like most Demigods, light sleepers all woke up together as Will spoke. They rubbed their eyes as they looked over at the Son of Hades and the Son of Apollo with a timid expression.

“Ugh, don’t call me that” Nico mumbled and rubbed his head, it hurt a little, like a miniature drum banging in his head. He guessed he deserved it though. Now he was fully awake he was able to think about how stupid he was. What was he thinking would happen? No one would find him? He was lucky that it was Will and not some random camper, though he didn’t miss Percy and Annabeth now becoming involved in his problems. He supposed better them than someone who didn’t know him. He tried his best not to look at the couple, tried his best not to look at anyone really.

“Here,” Will said, reaching into his jeans pocket and bringing out a square of Ambrosia “this should help the head” he explained with a winning smile and bright eyes. 

“Thanks” Nico mumbled and placed the ambrosia into his mouth, he tasted a happy meal.

“How you feeling” Piper asked, stretching herself out. Her bones cracked as she opened her mouth for a gigantic yawn. With her hair all stuck out unevenly in a bedhead and her clothes ruffled she certainly didn't look like a daughter of Aphrodite. Sometimes Nico thought that Will looked like the Son of both Apollo and Aphrodite, he could be in either cabin without question, though he knew Will's spirit and personality was perfectly fitted into Apollo.

“Fine” Nico mumbled in a harsh tone. If he’d only of stuck to his lone wolf plan then this would never of happened. Five people. Five people in the room. Five people knew his secret. He was a mess, a disaster and five people knew.

Jason stared at him like he was a feral dog. Eyes full of sympathy that Nico didn’t want nor deserve. For the last few months Jason had taken on the role of Nico’s big brother, he would stop by his cabin at least once a day, help him with his chores now it was just him in the cabin, and make him give up one of his half smiles. It was generally a nice relationship but Nico remembers at times the only reason that Jason had taken on this role was because he had found out that Nico was gay and thought it was his job to protect him. Before that Jason avoided him at all costs.

Piper gave him a small smile because that’s what Piper did. She smiled at him as if her charmspeak could drift through the gaps in her teeth and make him better. The only reason Piper was here, the reason Piper smiled at him was because she went were Jason went, not because she liked Nico. He knew that.

Percy fidgeted with his hands and avoided looking at Nico. They’d always had a troubling relationship and sometime when he was a bit younger Nico had gotten dislike and like twisted together. Nico had no problem with Percy but they’d never spoken about their old problems and it sits in-between them like a barrier now.

Annabeth’s stormy eyes held immense pity and sorrow that Nico never asked for. Nico had always in some way looked up to Annabeth, hearing all the stories of how brave she was as a young child it was hard not to, but he knew that as he looked up at Annabeth, she looked down at him.

Beside him Will Solace yawned, appearing unbothered by the situation. As a healer he had probably dealt with something similar to this before. He didn’t look sympathetic, give him a fake smile or avoid looking at him to unbelievable extents. He just acted the same as he always did. Annoying but arguably endearing.

“Can I just…can I just be left alone, please” Nico asked, eyes pulling apart the design of his bed covers. Five pairs of eyes stuck to him, waiting for him to add to it, to change his words or to move.

“Uh…no?” Jason said slowly and hesitantly looking around the room to find someone else to back him up. 

“Excuse me?” Asked Nico fiercely, sitting up on the bed and crossing his arms over his chest.

“I said no, Nico. No you’re not going to be alone anymore” Jason said a little stronger and surer. Piper nodded her head behind him. He couldn’t believe this. For years he was alone, he could handle being alone, it was who he was. How dare someone tell him what to do? They didn’t care. No one did. People just wanted to control him.

“You can’t just-”

“I can” Jason cut him off.

“No you can’t! I’m not in dange-”

“Yes you are!” Jason once again cut him off, making Nico’s anger excel. Percy and Annabeth looked at each other as if asking each other what’s going to happen next. They could see Nico getting restless, Jason too. A fight between a son of Zeus and a son of Hades was something no one would ever want to be around.

“Stop it!” Nico yelled, making everyone gasp.

“HEY, HEY, HEY. ENOUGH!” Will practically screamed, louder than any of them had been before. He grabbed the younger boys arm and Nico realised that he had been falling into the darkness without meaning to. Will looked at him sternly and he wanted to tell him he hadn’t meant to but why should he? Nico di Angelo didn’t have to answer to anyone. Did he?

“Nico,” Jason tried in a softer voice. “Just let one of us stay okay? Please?”

“Fine. Will can stay,” Nico shrugged. “since he’s the only one not looking at me like a basket case” He said and tried to ignore Will’s almost smug smile.

“Okay, little brother” Jason sighed and ruffled his hair. Nico felt a little bad, a little. But even if Jason cared, he cared to much. Nico couldn’t stand to look at the pain on the older boys face any longer. The pain he caused. “I’m sorry if I…made you feel….weird or whatever” Jason apologised. “I didn’t mean to I was just…you know scared” He told him, a single tear decorating his cheek.

“I’ll see you later, okay” Nico told him and tried a small smile for his sake. Jason took it and smiled back even larger.

“Yeah. Yeah, you will” Jason nodded. Walking up behind him, Piper grabbed his hand and gave a small tentative smile to Nico, he nodded back.

 “Feel better soon, Nico” She told him. He simply nodded his head at her as she walked out, Jason slowly in tow.

“I’d hug you, but I don’t want to push my luck” Annabeth said as she dragged Percy to the cabin door. “But Nico…just know that this doesn’t change my opinion of you at all. You’re strong for your age, you always have been” She told him.

“Th-thanks” He mumbled.

“And despite you’re believes or struggles, you’re my friend” She said to him, pulling Percy with her out the cabin, he was thankful for their quick departure, he didn’t really have anything to answer back with.

How can you tell the difference between friends and fakes? Sympathy and safety? Quick answer, you can’t.

“So what do you want to do today” Will beamed, sitting up from the other side of the bed and facing the son of Hades. He was so close that Nico forgot to answer and began to count the freckles on his face. “Yo! Earth to death boy?”

“Stop calling me that” Nico grumbled and threw a pillow and Will. He laughed and hugged the pillow. Nico held back a smile, Will’s laugh was so comforting and sure that it could lighten any situation. But if Nico gave away the fact he viewed Will as a friend then Will would never leave him alone.

“Alright then skeleton dude” Will grinned.

“No”

“Ghost kid-”

“No”

“Death breath-”

“No!” Nico yelled and through another pillow in Will’s face. As the Son of Apollo let out an amazing laugh Nico got off the bed and walked over to his drawers wear he pulled out clothes, jeans and a tshirt as always.

“What ya doing?” Will asked in a sing song voice, sprawling out on the vacant bed.

“Going to get changed?” Nico rolled his eyes, gesturing to the bathroom door. “Is there a problem sun boy?”

Will grinned at the name. “Leave the door open”

“Excuse me?” Nico asked, sending the boy a look worthy of petrifying anyone.

“Look, I’ll close my eyes and face the wall okay but I don’t trust you enough to-“

“I sent them away because they were babying me, Will! I’ll send you away too!” Nico yelled at him, stomping his foot on the floor. Will gave him an almost apologetic look but he wasn’t changing his mind.

“Im not going anywhere and neither are you. And to make sure of that I need to be able to hear you’re still breathing. So, door open” He told Nico sternly. “Please” He added as an afterthought.

“Fine!” Nico growled, aware he was giving up without much of a fight which was very uncharistic for him but there was something about Wills voice that told him no amount of fighting would have changed the outcome. He stomped his way into the bathroom and angrily threw his clothes onto the floor, but left the door open. He made sure that Will could indeed not see him before getting changed. He let out a sigh as he thought.

Will Solace was going to make his life hell, while trying to improve it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yeah. Sorry it sucked.  
> Tell me what sucked the most maybe? Probably I was just lazy and didn't plan it out or re-draft it.


	6. I like the sad guys, bad guys, mouth full of white lies.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Will was sunshine and Nico was darkness, they could balance each other out and make such a beautiful contradiction. He didn’t want some happy go lucky camper who was as bright as him, he needed a contrast, someone different from him, his literal other half.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alright guys, hope you like it. I wrote it in an hour so its probably quite atrocious.

Whilst Nico was in the bathroom Will cursed himself and his male hormones. Nico was in a fragile state, broken and in need of friends and here Will was wondering if it would be very bad to sneak a peek into the door. He would slap himself, but Nico would hear him and it would lead to a very strange and uncomfortable conversation.

He couldn’t pinpoint the exact moment that he knew he was crushing on the son of hades, but it wasn’t a recent thing. He remember seeing the boy and how powerful he was in the titan war, he at first thought that he was envious, that he wanted to be him but then he realised what he really wanted was to be _with_ him.

It was all very strange and confusing back at camp after the war, he never looked at any other of the campers the way he looked at Nico, never felt the same. There were other gay guys at camp of course and he even tried to go out with a few of them to no avail, they weren’t Nico. Will was sunshine and Nico was darkness, they could balance each other out and make such a beautiful contradiction. He didn’t want some happy go lucky camper who was as bright as him, he needed a contrast, someone different from him, his literal other half.  

He thought that since Nico wasn’t even at the camp anymore he would get over his crush but that never happened. He would see him now and again, popping back and forth but they never had a conversation where Will thought he was actually _noticed._ He had gave up hope of ever getting to know him until the day he popped back up again in a colourful Hawaiian shirt. Since that day Will has made it his job to be around Nico as much as possible, he even got mad when Nico wouldn’t come see him when he couldn’t get out of work. He thought that if they grew closer he could find out his chances; that was the only way he could ever get over his crush. And if his chances were good then he wouldn’t need to get over anything. Maybe he’d even get under.

From the bathroom came a loud thud that broke Will of his chain of thoughts. He snapped up from the bed as quick as light and practically flew over to the door.

“I’m fine stay out there!” Nico quickly yelled. Will couldn’t detect anything unusual in his voice, it didn’t shake or sound weak, but he stayed outside the door.

“What happened?” He asked.

“I…I fell over okay” Nico grumbled.

“You what?” Will snickered.

“I tripped in my jeans and fell okay Solace!” The son of hades growled and let out a gigantic sigh, the feeling of ‘pissed off’ literally radiated from him. Strangely enough Will always found Nico’s short temper endearing. Curse the hormones, he thought again.

“Alright then, try not to trip again Calamity Jane” Will laughed and sat back down on the boys bed.

“Yeah yeah try not to be such a smart ass, Wild Bill” Nico retorted. Will almost laughed at Nico’s knowledge of old west movies but then remembered he had a pretty big knowledge of them too. They had been mother’s favourite and he would always complain about being made to watch them but he secretly loved them, or he loved spending time with his Mom, the line was blurred between the two reasons.   

“Hey listen I need to go to infirmary just to check up on a few things” Will yelled in to Nico.

“Then go” Nico told him as he walked out of the bathroom. He wore black skinny jeans with some sort of safety pin belt and a black tshirt filled with skulls and hair hung around his face falling cosily in front of his eyes, the usual Nico di Angelo look.

“Okay, let’s go then” Will grinned and jumped up from the bed, marching over to the door.

“I don’t need a babysitter Solace, do I look like a freaking child?” Nico groaned and rolled his eyes.  

“And I don’t need your sass, di Angelo. So, come on!” Will groaned back, swiping his hands in and out the door in a ‘move it’ action. He knew that Nico wouldn’t be happy about having Will as his personal shadow but there was no was no way he was going to let Nico out his sight for a while, not when they were just getting close. He couldn’t lose him.

“Im fine, okay? I don’t need to be in your line of sight every single minute of the god damn day just to show you im alive. That’s not my job and it’s not your job to panic every time you can’t see me” Nico told him and throw himself onto Hazel’s vacant bed beside him. He crossed his arms over his chest and glared at Will. Well, he thought, it’s got to be the hard way.

“Alright,” Will sighed walking closer to the Nico who raised his eyebrows in suspicion “I guess if you don’t want to come to the infirmary with me, then there’s no other choice”

“That’s right” Nico nodded his head slowly.

“Unless,” Will smiled and reached into his pockets. “Im truly sorry it had to come to this death boy” he grinned as he attached one side of handcuffs around Nico’s wrist. The son of Hades looked at his wrist like it was on fire and then back to Will.

“Hey! I could summon an undead army to destroy you!” The boy yelled and wiggled his wrist around.

“Nah, you like me too much to destroy me” Will nodded, sure of himself, as he attached the other side of the handcuffs around his own wrists. Will waved the key to the cuffs in Nico’s face before putting it down the front of his jeans. Nico glared at him.

“Sure of that?” Nico huffed and yanked his wrist back, Will with it. He landed on Hazel’s bed face first beside Nico, his wrist in a very awkward and slightly painful position.

“Positive” Will mumbled into the bed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> School finishes up in 4 days so I should be posting more regular and the chapters should probably be better, more detailed and longer.
> 
> Kudos and comments are appreciated and cherished as always.


	7. We all got battle scars

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> He could feel something like building blocks crashing down as he realised he actually didn’t want to die. He did have friends. He did have a sister. And looking in front of him, he did have Will Solace.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay I realise the last chapter and this one are a little uneventful but in a few chapters we will have a visit from Camp Jupiter!

Have you ever been so embarrassed that you can’t even be bothered to glare or threaten anyone anymore?

That was what was happening to Nico.

Will dragged him all the way to the infirmary which, from the Hades cabin, was quite a far walk. Most of the kids at this point would be doing their daily chores or activities but there were still a few like them free of any duties that were walking around freely. Those who looked at them were either severely confused or grinning wildly and running away, probably to tell other people.

“I freaking knew it” Travis yelled and poked his brother in the stomach to make him turn around.

Will drew a hand across his neck several times in a ‘cut it out’ motion whilst mouthing ‘No’ at the Stoll brothers. They looked at each other confused for a few seconds before bursting into laughter.

“What was that abo-”

“Look the infirmary, there it is” Will yelled and ran towards it. Nico almost fell due to his surprise at the quick advance but quickly caught his footing and was forced to run beside the son of Apollo.

“Busy day?” Will asked one of his siblings as he entered the infirmary.

“Not real- what the hell?” Will’s brother turned round and stared at the twos boys handcuffed hands. The boy was called Liam and was around about 14 but that’s all Nico really knew. That’s all he knew about most of the camp, their names and ages, he had never stuck around long enough to find out more.  At times he wished he had stuck around.

“It’s uh…a game” Nico offered before Will could think of a worse excuse.

“A game?” Liam raised an eyebrow.

“Yes a game!” Will confirmed and jiggled his wrist around for effect.

The metal banged off his scars making him wince. It was cold and hard. He deserved it.

“Oh god’s Nico, im so sorry!” Will gasped when he realised what he done.  He outstretched his other hand to pat Nico’s shoulder, Nico rejected a grimace and let the other boy touch him.

“Alright then,” Liam grinned looking at his brother. Will scowled back. “There’s not much for you to do Will but Ellie’s been here for like forty minutes if you want to see her”

“Meh, I guess so” Will shrugged his shoulders.

They walked, or rather Will pulled Nico, into another small room that was probably some sort of waiting room. 6 year old Ellie from the Iris cabin was sitting crossed legged on one of the chairs with a stuffed Pegasus on her lap.

“Hey Ellie” Will smiled as he closed the door.

“Hi Will, Hi Nico” She grinned and waved.

Nico waved back with a little smile. She was kind of adorable, with her blonde curly mane of hair, baby blue eyes and denim pinafore. She had little bits of glitter around her like she was playing with one of her older sibling’s makeup.

 “So, what’s the problem today?” Will asked, moving two chairs in front of the little girl. He sat on one, pulling Nico’s wrist to a very uncomfortable position forcing him to sit on the other seat. Will offered a sheepish smile when Nico made a startled noise.

“Lion’s wing came off” She frowned and held up the evidence of the Pegasus with a missing wing in one hand and said missing wing on the other hand.

“His name’s Lion?” Nico had to ask.

“Her name’s Lion” She corrected and rolled her eyes.

“Alright, Ellie. I’m positive I can fix her” Will promised and held out his hands for the stuffed toy.

“She has a tea party in half an hour” Ellie informed Will like a concerned parent as she handed over Lion.

“She will be perfect for the party” Will assured her. “Alright death boy I’m going to need both my hands for this so…I’m going to un-cuff you” The son of Apollo told him. “But you have to stay here and converse with Ellie through this tough situation. Isn’t that right Ellie?” He added when Nico grinned.

“Yes. Or I’ll cry” Ellie told him. She looked like one of those kids who hadn’t shed a single tear in her life unless it was for ulterior motives.

“See there you go” Will nodded. He pulled Nico up and turned him around so he could awkwardly get the key out of its earlier holder. When the cuffs came off Nico stretched his hand out, wincing at the pain, Will also took part in the procedure.

“Nico stay” Ellie ordered, pointing at Nico’s vacant chair with a strong look on her face.

“Nico stay” Nico agreed and sat back on the chair with a small smile directed towards the daughter of iris. She grinned back, showing half a set of teeth.

“Well, I’m going to take this brave soldier to her operation. We won’t be long” Will told the two as he walked outside the door.

“Can you make zombies appear” Ellie asked Nico, balancing her head in her hands and staring up at him with her bright baby blue eyes.

“I…can” Nico said hesitantly.

“Are they friendly?” She asked.

“Some are” answered Nico truthfully. He’d had his fair share of evil dead spirits but as he worked on his powers he learned how to specifically contact the helpful and the friendly.

“I don’t believe you” Ellie grinned and twirled a blonde curl around her finger.

“You don’t huh?” Nico grinned back. He had always expected the little ones to be scared of him, he didn’t think he would mind that but now he knows if that were to be true he would mind it a lot. Little Ellie along with others proved to be very entertaining and a good reason for gods to claim their children early.

“Nope” She said, popping the ‘p’.

Nico smirked at her as he made a zombie/skeleton head pop up from the floor and wink at her before melting back into the ground.

She squealed and clapped her hands. “Yay!” She beamed.

Ellie moved her seat closer to Nico and asked him to play a game of Patty cake. He hesitatively agreed. She seemed excited enough but after a few minutes of playing she suddenly stopped.

“I know what those are” She told him.

“What?”

“Them” She huffed and pointed to his wrists. His blood ran cold, his heart stopped but at the same time went faster than ever before. “There battle scars, my sister had them” She nodded her head.

“Oh” Was all he managed to say and he pulled down his jumper.

“No no no!” She yelled, annoyed. She grabbed his arms and pulled up his sleeves. Nico wanted to snatch his arm back and run away but she was only a kid. Only a kid. “You can’t be ashamed of them! Their battle scars, Nico! Who doesn’t love battle scars!” She said exasperatedly and shook her head, blonde curls flying everywhere.

“That’s right, Ellie” A voice said from the door. Nico whipped his head round, hearing it make a violent crack but not caring. Will held the stuffed Pegasus in his hands with is re-attached wing. “They are indeed battle scars. But sometimes, some people want to keep their battle scars a secret”

“But why?” The girl asked, tilting her head looking like Cerberus when Nico brought him a treat, but more angelic.

“Because it’s their battle, no one else needs to know about it” Will told her, closing the door and softly walking to the back of Nico’s chair. Nico shivered, wishing he could shadow travel out of here, out of the camp but he knew that that wasn’t the right way to deal with it. “So you have to promise that Nico’s battle scars stay a secret”

“I promise” She nodded, thoroughly. Her hair wildly flying in every direction.

“What happened to your sister?” Nico gulped.

“Mum said she was going to be reborn. Maybe into a Pegasus and then we can play again!” She grinned and made grabby hands at her toy. Will gave her it with a small smile.

“Lion’s all better now, ready for her tea party” Will told the girl. “Remember that no one else can find out about Nico’s battle scars okay? Lion has to promise too” He added.

“We promise” She told the boys and made a zip motion on her mouth. “You can make Nico better like you do with my Pegasi!” She said before she ran out of the room. The door slammed behind her leaving the two boys in deadly silence. The only sound was Will moving to sit on the Ellie’s vacant seat.

_Just let it go, you can shadow travel out. Shadow travel to the top of a bridge, shadow travel to the bottom of the ocean. Get out. Let go._

“Nico” Will whispered, breaking the silence. “She’s right you know. They are battle scars, and you will get better” He promised, moving his hands forward like he wanted to grab Nico’s hands but pulling back.

 _He doesn’t want to touch you. Your darkness is contagious. Unlovable. Better off dead._  

“Nico” Will tried again. This time taking Nico’s hands in his. “You are not a lost case. You are important. You’re _very_ important to me okay. If you’re gone, then I may as well be as well”

“Don’t say that” Nico mumbled, taking his hands away and avoiding eye contact.

_Liars everywhere. You make them lie. Corrupter. You ruin everything._

“Why not? It’s true. Take the handcuffs as a metaphor, if you will. I’ve handcuffed myself to you now, it’s too late, we’re bestfriends. There’s no getting out of it. I’m going to be here forever”

“Are you trying to scare me here” Nico asked, a small smile playing on his lips.

“Nope, I’m just telling the truth. I’m yours now” Will told him and grabbed his hands again. “I’m not leaving. Please don’t leave either” Will begged him, rubbing the boys hands. It was like Zeus had sent down a small electric bolt and placed it inside the boys clasped hands, pleasant and tingly but could turn deadly with too much power.

 Nico could feel Will’s eyes boring into him and he couldn’t help it, it was like a call to him. Those big precious eyes of the healer boy. He turned his head round and stared back.

“I don’t want to…” Nico whispered, his eyes filling with tears. He could feel something like building blocks crashing down as he realised he actually didn’t want to die. He did have friends. He did have a sister. And looking in front of him, he did have Will Solace.

But he knew that those building blocks of depression were going to build themselves right back up again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just...I'm getting worse at writing. May Zeus strike me with lightning.  
> Schools out though so hopefully there will be frequent chapter updates!


	8. I can't pretend

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Hey I’m sorry, I know it’s none of my business” She shook her head and placed a comforting hand on top of his. He didn’t feel threated or uncomfortable by it, Annabeth was just one of those people that you knew exactly who she was and what she was doing. You could tell when she was angry, when she was going to hurt you, when you’ve made her sad. And he could see now that all she was trying to do was help.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wrote this in like an hour so its rushed and not very good.

The Hades cabin was pretty lonely at times. Hazel visited as much as she could but most of the time Nico was alone in the cabin. He didn’t mind it at times, but then some nights it was too strange for the only sound to be his own breathing that he just listened to it till the sunrise.

Much to most people’s surprise and his own denial, Nico didn’t enjoy being alone.

Which was why he was both irritated and happy when Will decided to sleep on Hazel’s vacant bed to make sure Nico was okay. Not that he needed it.

It was probably against camp rules, but there was no rule that two demigods of the same sex couldn’t be alone so really it was only one rule breakage.

The first couple of nights Will would sit up and watch Nico and he would pretend to be asleep until Will eventually lay down. It was strange. He didn’t feel in danger when he was being watched like he usually would, he felt the opposite- protected. He would never say those such words, that he needed or wanted a protector but it was a nice feeling to just have a friend that was willing to loose sleep just to make sure he was okay.

Nico had told Will to get some sleep around 1 o’clock since he was visibly sleep deprived, he had to promise to wake Will up if he felt in danger or needed someone to talk to. But Nico was quite contempt lounging in bed and reading the comic books Will had given him.

A blonde head of curls popped itself through the door before opening the door right open and creeping in. “Hey Nik-Nak” Annabeth grinned and leaned on the door frame. She had on her orange camp half-blood tshirt and a pair of denim shorts, showing off her sun kissed legs.

“I think that I dislike that nickname more than deathboy” He sighed. Closing his comic book and sitting it on the table beside him on top of the pile of other’s he had already read.

“What cha reading” She smiled, she was after all a child of Athena and very excited to see him reading, even if it was only a comic.

“Just some comics Will brought me” He shrugged. Annabeth looked over at Will sleeping and back to Nico, like they were a pair of puppies who had done something funny. “They’re pretty good” Nico admitted, suppressing a small smile.

“Hey, you’ve been stuck in here for so long. Fancy a walk?” Annabeth asked, gesturing outside of the door. It wasn’t that he was back to his old days of not wanting to join in on camp activities and get out of his cabin, but Will and the others thought it best for him to just hang out in his cabin with them. Though they were trying too hard to amuse him, Percy and Jason wanted to learn how to play mythomagic with him but all it ended in was the two of them arguing over who has been there the most for Nico. He never put any input into it but if he was honest, Percy had been there for most of his life and was like this protective friend who occasionally saves his ass and then in favour needs his ass saved but Jason was like the big brother he’d never had. Though it was hardly something to argue over. Piper had came by a few times without Jason to make sure that he was eating properly and had changed his clothes and also to complain about how long his hair was getting. Will seemed to like his long hair though, especially when he tied it up in a little pony tail at the back of his head.

“Sure, let’s just leave Will to sleep though” Nico nodded and swung his legs over the bed to get up.

They walked around the camp, Annabeth asked him about the comics Will had gave him though he suspected she didn’t really care but just wanted to hear him speak. And he asked about how she was keeping Percy in line.

“It’s a full time job I’ll tell you that” She laughed. “What about you?”

“ _What_ about me?” Nico asked as they sat on the grass together. He pulled out a few strands of grass and practically heard a Nymph winch so he stopped.

“Keeping Will in line?” She asked, a small smirk playing on her lips.

“Uh…”Nico stared at her dumbfounded.

“Or is he not your type either?” She asked, her eyebrows raising and her head tilted.

He stared at the grass silently hoping that if he pulled a flower out a Nymph would just carry him away and dispose of him.

“Hey I’m sorry, I know it’s none of my business” She shook her head and placed a comforting hand on top of his. He didn’t feel threated or uncomfortable by it, Annabeth was just one of those people that you knew exactly who she was and what she was doing. You could tell when she was angry, when she was going to hurt you, when you’ve made her sad. And he could see now that all she was trying to do was help.

“He doesn’t even know that im…that im… _that_ ” Nico mumbled, practically hissing out the last word.

“Listen to me Nico okay?” Annabeth ordered him, moving his face with her hands so he was looking at her. “I know you’re from a different time and that back then being gay wasn’t an easy thing-”

“it wasn’t a legal thing” Nico pitched in.

“But now is different. Now is good and getting better every day. Homosexual marriage is legal in 50 states now!” She excitedly said and tapped his knees. “What you said to Percy when I was right there was confidence in who you are. It’s in you somewhere Nico, that confidence and acceptance is just waiting to show”

“Confidence is over rated” He mumbled, dipping his head down again.

She reached forward and once again made him look at her. “No it’s not. You should be confident in yourself and proud of yourself, like we all are. Like Will is” Annabeth assured him. She looked amused by his blush. Why should anyone be proud of Nico? He hadn’t done anything spectacular, he hadn’t been this amazing godsend like half the camp. He just  brought death like the Son of Hades he is.

“I don’t want to be…like this” Nico whispered, feeling tears around his eyes and violently blinking to get them away.

“Gay?” Nico nodded. “Why not? It’s not a big thing. You like boys? Who the hell cares?” She shrugged. “It doesn’t characterise you into anything. You’re Nico di Angelo, Son of Hades, who after all of his hard life still managed to wake up every day and put a smile on so many people’s faces. Especially one, blonde, son of Apollo’s face” She smirked and grabbed his hand. He didn’t know how she knew that Nico held a liking for Will, he cursed himself for making it obvious. But he trusted Annabeth not to tell anyone or tease him for it no matter how out of his league Will may be. Will liked him, but not the way Nico liked him.

“I…have a crush on Will” Nico nodded, speaking slowly, saying it out loud for the first time.

“And that, my small little friend, is fucking awesome” Annabeth grinned.

“I’m not that small” Nico growled at her.

“Yeah you are” She laughed and ruffled his hair like Bianca used to. He wondered if Bianca would be as accepting as Annabeth about his sexuality. He thought she would, but she did come from the same time as him, where it wasn’t an option to even think about being such a thing. But then again, she was Bianca, sweet loving big sister Bianca. And he knew, somehow he knew that she would love him despite who he chose to love.

“When did you realise you liked Percy as more than friends?” Nico asked, looking up at Annabeth for the first time on his own accord.

“Well, he’s still my bestfriend as well of course, those things never change. But, I guess it was this gradual thing, I began to see him the way other people probably did, as more than the annoying 12 year old that bugged the shit out of me” She laughed. It was like a proper laugh, no holding herself back, it was loud and she didn’t appear to care that it was loud. He liked it. “But when I did realise it, there was no going back and I knew it. He was it for me” She blushed. Even to this day talking about her boyfriend made her blush. When Nico looked back he thought that he never really did like Percy that way, he was just someone who could like because he could never have. He was as straight as they come, destined to be with the beautiful Annabeth from the moment they met and everyone knew it. The only reason Nico channelled his feelings to Percy is because he knew he’d never have to make them public or have his heart broken but…with Will.

“WHERE IS HE?!” A voice shrieked.

“Speak of the devil” Annabeth smirked and slapped Nico’s cheek lightly and playfully.

“DI ANGELO!” Will was now in sight at the top of the hill. Annabeth and Nico sat together at the bottom of the hill, Annabeth laughing with tears in her eyes and Nico wishing that he could run.

“Hello” Nico offered lamely with a wave.

“No note?! NOTHING?!” Will wailed as he ran down the hill, practically tumbled down it. “What were you doing!?”

“With Annabeth, obviously” Nico rolled his eyes and gestured beside him, Annabeth came out of her laughing fit long enough to give Will a wave.

“You could have woke me up!” He shouted, wildly throwing his arms around. The campers didn’t even try to pretend they weren’t watching the two boys.

“You needed sleep, Solace”

“I _needed_ to know you’re okay, di Angelo!” Will retorted and jabbed a finger in Nico’s direction.

“Well, I am. I’m perfectly cable of taking care of myself, I’ve been doing it since I was a kid” Nico reminded him and stood up, brushing the grass off his jeans. He gave the ogling campers a glare and they reluctantly walked away.

“And look well that turned out!” Will mumbled.

Annabeth stopped laughing and instead looked immensely awkward and uncomfortable. “Really Will he was fine. I just wanted to have a talk with him. It wasn’t his fault. He really did just want you to catch some sleep like you deserved” She told him.

Will scratched the back of his neck and kicked the ground with his foot. “I was just worried” He muttered. He couldn’t argue with Annabeth, no one really could argue with a child of Athena.

“I never asked you to worry” Nico sighed.

“You didn’t need to ask” The son of Apollo rolled his eyes. “It’s what people do when they care about each other” He explained and stomped his foot.

“Yeah yeah okay sunshine. Just stop causing scenes” The son of Hades laughed and gently shoved the other boys shoulder. Annabeth grinned behind him.

“Alright kids, who wants to go get lunch” She suggested and pulled herself up from the ground.

“I need to help out at the infirmary today actually. I promised. Since I haven’t been there for a while” He said sheepishly, looking at Nico with an apologetic look.

“Piper and I were gonna hang out today, Nico can join us” Annabeth said.

“Yippee” Nico mumbled sarcastically. But it did sound better than the infirmary. He liked to help Will out every now and again but he couldn’t help feeling awkward and unsettled, a child Hades in a healing facility? It didn’t add up any more than the boy of darkness having a crush on the boy of light did.

“Oh…that’s good. Yeah” Will nodded. “Just make sure he eats lunch!” He added as an afterthought with a smile.

“I promise if he doesn’t eat it Piper will charmspeak him into devouring it” Annabeth grinned wildly. Nico sighed.

“Good idea” Will laughed. His laugh was as loud as Annabeth’s but it was more… musical and soothing at the same time. “I’ll see you later then Deathboy!” He grinned, white teeth as shiny as they could possible be. With a small mock salute he ran up the hill.

“Feel free to sleep in your own cabin” Nico mumbled low enough for him to not hear it.

“Yeah that won’t happen” laughed Annabeth. “Come on Nik-Nak, let’s go get some lunch” She threw her hand over Nico’s shoulder. Nico pretended to hate it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My chapters get worse every week. Help me.  
> Just a question, I myself swear a lot so sometimes I just kind of let it seep into the fanficiton but does anyone have a big problem with that or?...tell me in the comments please!


	9. I'm peeling the skin of my face

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> He wanted to believe that having Will around was a forever thing. That in time Nico would finally feel safe in a friendship. But he had a way of ruining good things.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I haven't actually prof read this so sorry...

It was one of those rare moments Nico was alone. He had spent the remainder of his day with Piper and Annabeth, they got diner together and Piper did in fact charmspeak him into eating every bit of it. The two girls had a thorough talk with him regarding Will, apparently Piper knew of Nico’s crush what with being a daughter of Aphrodite, and thought it was ‘adorable’ which felt like a slap to the face for Nico. He wasn’t ‘adorable’ nor did he do ‘adorable’ things, he was the Son of Hades, he had survived Tartarus alone and the things he saw would forever sit on his shoulder making him the very opposite of ‘adorable’. She also told him that she had a suspicion that Will liked him too, but Nico choose to ignore it and labelled it down as one of those blatant lies people say to make him feel better.

Will was still caught up in the infirmary with a strange curse the Hecate cabin had put on the Hermes kids for stealing their charms, the curse made them throw up glitter which Piper had named the dangerous/fabulous curse. Nico thought it was strangely cruel, which coming from him was rich.

The son of Apollo visited him on a ten minute break to tell him he wouldn’t be finished for another couple of hours and would feel a lot better if Nico would hang with Annabeth, or anyone else for that matter, for the hours he was gone. Nico of course was having none of it and argued his butt off. In the end Will agreed to let Nico stay in his cabin alone after he promised over the River Styx not to hurt himself.

As Nico sat in the bath, looking at the pink fleshy patterns over his thighs and wrists he regretted his promise.

If they were ‘battle scars’ then when would his battle finally be over. It certainly wasn’t now, or else he wouldn’t be feeling attracted to the idea of a razor slitting across the old scars making them new. His hands itched for it, but his promise to Will rang in his ears.

He hated that he actually _wanted_ to keep the promise to him.

He _hated_ that he didn’t _hate_ Will.

Instead of staring at the destroyed body, he thought of Will. His glowing mop of blond hair that radiated heat. His whole hearted laugh that seemed to be reserved for Nico. How he actually _cared_.

He imagined an alternative universe were Nico wasn’t such a fuck up and Will felt the same way. They walked around camp, holding hands, and no one cared. It was okay. Nico wasn’t afraid of contact and Will wasn’t afraid of Nico giving it. They kissed, and Will’s lips were as soft as Nico had always thought. He radiated heat and light, and it mixed with Nico’s darkness. They were happy, and Nico didn’t mess it up.

Nico was making himself sick with the affection he felt.

He was the sun of Hades. He’d turned a boy into a ghost. He let a boy kill himself. He was dangerous, dark and doomed to an unhappy life.

He didn’t deserve Will. Will didn’t deserve to be stuck with Nico. Darkness didn’t mix with light, it trapped it, suffocated it. Destroyed it.

He wanted to believe that having Will around was a forever thing. That in time Nico would finally feel safe in a friendship. But he had a way of ruining good things.

The son of Hades added to the baths water. Tears ran down his face. The feeling of tears on his skin was the same as blood. The silky soft trickle. Running down his face. Dripping. Water. Blood. Pain.

He wanted pain, he wanted blood. But in the end it was water, and he had to keep his promise.

“Nicky?” The unmistakable voice of Will Solace made rang through the cabin and was softly heard from the bathroom. The cabin door opened and Nico could hear Will’s footsteps come in.

“Fuck did you just call me?” Nico sniffled a laugh. He cursed his shaky voice and frantically rubbed his nose.

“I called you Nicky” Will yelled. “And now I know you don’t like it I’m not going to stop calling you it”

“Ass” Nico whispered, knowing that he couldn’t hear him from outside but needing to say it anyway.

 “Hey…what are you uh…doing in there” Asked Will, knocking on the door lightly.

“Gods, Will. I’m in a bath just go…lie down, sleep or something” Nico sighed. Rubbing the tears of his cheek. He was going to have puffy eyes when he left the room and he knew that Will would insist on comforting him and interrogating him.

He could hear Will shifting his feet outside the door. “Are you crying?” He asked.

“No” Nico said. “Not anymore…just leave me alone okay” He added when he knew Will would be able to tell he was lying.

“Can I come in” Will asked.

“What the Hades, no” Nico exclaimed, splashing his hands in the water. He could feel his face getting warm and knew it must be a bright shade of red. He was glade Will hadn’t just barged in, he might have just died. “I don’t have…clothes on. I’m fine okay. I kept my promise. Just let me sit here for a while”

 Will took a minute to answer, as if debating his choices. “Okay…but I’m just out here if you need me” He assured him.

“Super” Nico mumbled.

He stayed in the bath for about ten more minutes, in complete silence which probably made Will uneasy. Then he stepped out and dried himself off. His face was blotchy, an unmistakable sign of a fragmented and weak boy.

“Nico?” Will yelled from outside.

“I’m coming out, give me a sec” He sighed and shoved on an oversized black tshirt and pyjama bottoms.

“Is it okay if I borrow a shirt? I forgot mine” asked Will from outside the bathroom door.

Nico gulped. “Sure. Top drawer”

“Thanks”

He waited a few minutes, he didn’t want to catch Will shirtless. It could give away everything and humiliate him to new extents. When he walked out he was sure he was going to be humiliated anyway.

Will had on a black skull tshirt, it was too big for Nico like how he liked it but on Will it was the perfect fit. He looked like something from Nico’s dreams. His bright hair, vibrant blue eyes and sun kissed skin contradicted with the dark tshirt in such a pleasing way. He didn’t look punk and dark like Nico, but like Cupid, unbearable to look at due to how beautiful he was. Handsome wasn’t the right word, but beautiful was the perfect fit. Just like Cupid, looking at Will brought feelings of hate. Nico felt disgusted by how beautiful he really found Will. Annabeth had told him that his feelings were okay, but that wasn’t enough to change everything he had always felt.

Nico gulped and made his way towards his bed, trying to avoid eye contact, or any sort of contact. Hazel’s sheet barrier was taken down and Will was fully visible at all times. A blessing and a curse.  

“You wanna talk about it?” Will asked as they both lay down on separate beds.

“Talk about what?” asked Nico.

“Why you were crying” Will prompted. He knew Will wanted to help, to fix him, but Nico wasn’t in the mood to be forced back together.

“No” He answered and shifted his body on his side, facing the wall and away from Will.

“Okay. Just remember I’m here. Always here” Will whispered. Nico never replied.

 _Always is an awfully long time. One could fuck up a lot with ‘always’_. Nico thought, but never said out loud.

He felt like shit. It was one step forward to steps back.

He wanted to take three steps forward. Towards Will.

He wanted to have the confidence he had whilst telling Percy he used to have a crush on him. He wanted to use it to tell Will that he had a burning crush on him.

He wanted to for once not be rejected.

But who would want a shattered mess when they were a picture beautiful perfection.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm really bad at planning my chapters out but Hazel and Reyna will be able to help little Nico out soon.  
> Tell me if you liked or disliked the chapter. Not one of my bests.


	10. When they knock you down, kid you gotta stand up

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “And he’s very important to me. Friends are very important to me. And I don’t like it when they get hurt” Her voice went all serious and Nico was scared mostly for Will but for himself as well. Annabeth caught his eye and gave him a worried glance. “When they get hurt, the person who hurts them gets severely hurt”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Eh, once again I couldn't be bothered to prof read so...sorry.

When people began to question Will’s whereabouts at night Nico forced him back to his own cabin. He still stalked him during the day, with Grace at his heels and the rest of the party not far behind. Due to Pipers charmspeak and forcing food into his mouth he had gain a few pounds and was beginning to fit into his own clothes that were always too baggy, though he always liked them that way. Once when everyone was together Will told Nico he looked good and ‘fit’, Annabeth chocked on her drink when she saw Nico blush.

Things were going fine, not ‘great’ or even ‘good’ but fine. He hadn’t let a razor on his skin, he hadn’t jumped in any freezing cold lakes, and he hadn’t even punched anything. But there was always the battle that played inside him. He never felt good enough, he looked too long at Solace and daily embarrassed himself because of it.

A few days ago Will and Nico had decided to spend the day chilling outside, they lay down beside a tree and just talked. Well, Will talked and Nico listened with occasional input. Nico had never knew before that day that Will was a year round camper, he always thought he had a Mom to go home to. But he learned that his Mother died in a car crash when he was 10, he lived at camp half-blood ever since. Nico never said ‘I’m sorry’ because he always hated when someone said that to him, an apology for something that wasn’t your fault didn’t mean shit as far as Nico was concerned. So he instead asked what he remembered of her, what he missed. In the end Will cried, and clung to Nico’s waist, burying his head onto his chest. It felt nice being needed, but it felt weird comforting someone. He’d never really done it before, with only Hazel as an exception. But he held onto Will and smoothed his hair, whispering comfort to him.

He hadn’t been able to be alone with the son of Apollo since. He was in too deep and he knew it. Balancing on a thin thread that was about to snap and break him in any moment.

“Knock knock” A soft voice interrupted his thoughts.

Nico looked up and jumped of his bed at the sight of his sister. He ran over and swooped her up in a hug. “You never said you were coming!” He laughed as he set her down back on her feet. She had grew a little, got a little more muscles as well but she was still undoubtedly his sweet little sister. Her mane of hair was tied up into a pony tail and she wore a camp Jupiter tshirt and long decent shorts.

“I wanted it to be a surprise” Hazel said as she touched his cheek. “It’s so good to see you” She smiled.

“It’s good to see you too” Nico told her and smiled back, a real smile, a big one.

“Some of the camp are also here if you want to go see?”

“Frank and Reyna” Nico asked excitedly. He never realised before how much he missed the extended family in Rome. It was doubtful that both Frank and Reyna where here since they were the ones running  Camp Jupiter.

“Yep, they’re just with the others just now” Hazel grinned.

“Really!” yelled Nico.

“Yeah let’s go see them, brother” She said and went on her tip toes to kiss his cheek.

Hazel and Nico walked through camp together occasionally brushing shoulders, he was aware that people were staring as he couldn’t keep the smile off his face.

The smile got bigger as he caught sight of his friends. They were all sitting on the ground, Frank had his back against the tree and Reyna sat beside him, Hazel had told him that they became good friends when they started to work together. Reyna laughed loudly at something Percy had said, her laugh was contagious and Nico found himself wanting to laugh. It was weird seeing her just then without her armour, she looked just like a normal teenager with shorts and a purple tshirt. When he looked at Frank he was surprised to see him once again buffed up more, it was like every time he saw him again he went up another weight and muscle class. It he didn’t have that little panda face Nico might be intimidated.

“Di Angelo!” Reyna yelled as she caught sight of him. She pushed herself out of the bench and ran over to him. “I’m going to hug you” She informed him just before grabbing him in a bone crushing hug. “And you’re going to like it” Reyna ordered.

“I missed you” He laughed, his voice almost broke, he had never laughed this much in a day.

“I missed you too Nic” She grinned letting him out the embrace. He would chastise her for the nickname like he did for everyone else but instead he just grinned back.

Nico said his hello’s to the group and sat himself on the ground next to Jason. He barely kept up with the conversation, just sat there with a small smile on his face, but then his ears pricked up as Reyna asked him a question.

“Hm?” He asked.

“I said,” She rolled her eyes as if repeated herself was beneath her, “where is this friend of yours Will Solace”

“Probably hiding in the bushes with binoculars waiting for me to break a health rule” Nico joked.

“I swear this is just good timing and I wasn’t hiding in the bushes” A voice said behind him. He turned round to the very red face of Will Solace and laughed.

“Of course you weren’t Solace” Said Nico.

“I was actually sitting in the tree’s” Will said with a smirk. The sun surrounded him as if was radiated from inside the son of Apollo. Just by looking at him Nico got all hot and bothered thinking about how close they were a few days ago. He wished that he could make himself not like Will, make himself just think of them as friends but he couldn’t stop the thoughts he felt of wanting more.

“Hello” Reyna drawled and slowly waved at Will.

“Hey, it’s Reyna right?” Will asked as he threw himself on the grass next to Nico, their knees touching. His knee felt like it was burning but moving it would make it very obvious that he was uncomfortable, and he wasn’t ready for a conversation where he had to _explain_ why he was uncomfortable.

“That’s right, and you of course must be Will” She smiled. It wasn’t like a normal smile it was like a playful shit starter smile.

Will nodded and began tearing up pieces of grass from the ground, obviously unaware of the nature nymphs who would gladly spit in his face because of it. After he got a big enough pile of grass he dumped it on Nico’s feet.

“You’re such a child, Solace” Nico growled and lifted the grass up throwing it at the other boys chest. Some of it went down his tshirt and Will had to pick it out with a look of disgust.

“Who’s the child now” Will smirked.

“Both of you” Frank laughed.

“I’m technically older than all of you!” Nico said and jabbed a finger at them.

“Same here” Nodded Hazel.

“Nah, you’re still my little bro” Jason said and trapped Nico’s head in his arms to ruffle his hair.

“Ay” Complained Nico, fixing his hair when he was let go. He secretly liked hearing Jason call him that. He liked being the little brother again.

“So, Will, I want to thank you for taking care of Nico in the infirmary” Reyna said, in her tone of voice that meant ‘there’s more coming, and it’s gonna be a shit storm’.

“Oh it’s no bother. He was a charm to have around” Will laughed and winked at Nico. The skeleton butterflied where banging themselves against his stomach no, making him feel like he was going to be sick.

“He always is” Reyna smiled, sending Nico a sarcastic look. “And he’s very important to me. Friends are very important to me. And I don’t like it when they get hurt” Her voice went all serious and Nico was scared mostly for Will but for himself as well. Annabeth caught his eye and gave him a worried glance. “When they get hurt, the person who hurts them gets severely hurt”

“I’m pretty sure Nico could take Solace in a fight” Percy laughed.

“I’d put money on it” Frank added in.

“There’s not only physical hurt. Theirs emotional hurt and if you so much as-”

“Alright!” Nico cut her off and stood up from the ground, glaring at Reyna. “We’re going for a walk” He informed the group and grabbed Reyna arm, raising her up from the ground and dragging her away.

The group sat in silence behind them, baffled by the encounter, Solace being the most confused of them all. If things weren’t awkward between them before, they certainly would be now.

“What was that about!?” Nico yelled as soon as he thought they were out of earshot from the others.

“I know you’re in a relationship with him, I’m just looking out for you” Reyna shrugged her shoulders as if it was an obvious thing.

“W-w-what!” Nico spluttered, waving his hands around. “I’m not…we’re not…”

“Don’t bother lying” She sighed and subconsciously cracked her knuckles. The noise made Nico cringe.

“Im not l-lying!” He snapped. “Fuck, he’s going to ask me about this now and what the fuck am I supposed to say. Fuck” He cursed and grabbed his head with both hands, pulling at the hair a little.

“For real…” Reyna asked, awkwardly as if only just realising her giant horrible fucking disastrous mistake.

“For fucking real” Nico told her.

“Oh” Reyna said. “I misread it then. Just the way you spoke about him when we iris messaged, and the way the others described you’re friendship I just thought”

“Well, you thought wrong” Nico barked.

“I’m sorry” Reyna said and put her hands on Nico’s shoulders. He wanted to be mad, but he couldn’t bring himself to it.

“I am…I am gay…though” He threw the words out, with Annabeth’s word’s running through his head. _“You like boys? Who the hell cares?”_

“I know” Reyna scrunched up her eyebrows as if to say ‘what do I do with this useless information’.

“Oh…” Nico drawled. “But Will isn’t…you know”

“He is” She said in a matter of fact.

“What-what, you don’t even know him?” Nico stuttered.

“I see the way he looks at you, his voice when he speaks to you. He likes you” Reyna told him. “And…you like him too” She said, a small smile creeping up.

“N-no I don’t” He offered lamely.

“Mhh, hmm. You so do” She laughed. He was struck by how unprofessional and young she looked, she was acting like a real teenager and who was he to stay angry at her for acting to normally. She had changed so much in the last few months, in ways he never got to see over iris message. He wasn’t going to stay angry with her through her visit when he could be getting to re-know her and spend time with her.

“Alright princess I’ve had enough of this conversation” Said Nico as he slapped her on the shoulder.

“Can I be your bridesmaid when you get married?” Reyna asked innocently. Nico threw her into a bush.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm going on holiday and wont be posting for two weeks but please stay tuned!


	11. Somebody to lean on

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “What was Reyna going on about?” Will started, practically as soon as Nico had shut the door. He stood, facing the door and away from Will for the longest time before turning around again. The boy sat on an armchair across from Nico’s bed where he used to sleep before Nico had told him that Hazel’s bed was fair game and she wouldn’t mind him sleeping on it. He had bags under his blood shocked eyes and was edgily picking at his skin. “Did I…hurt you, in anyway?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Back from my two week holiday, got a chapter for you guys! (as always I haven't prof read it, sorryyy)

The conversation revolving around Reyna’s absent minded threat was undoubtedly going to occur, and it was certainly going to be awkward, Nico thought perhaps the most awkward a conversation could ever be.

Hazel had left with Percy to tend to some Pegasi that had dropped off , thinking about it later on Nico probably should have went with him, even if the only Pegasus Nico liked was Blackjack and vice versa. Will had caught on to the fact Nico once again was alone in the cabin and asked if he could come over after dinner. The shitstorm that was coming was clear in the distance but Nico knew he could hardly refuse Will’s offer or he’d have to face another even bigger shitstorm.

Dinner has never came and gone so fast for Nico, he found himself savouring his meal and never wanting Jason’s fruitless banter and talk to end, so that he wouldn’t have to endure this awkward conversation with Solace.

Of course dinner did end, he said goodbye to Jason who had obviously picked up on his unease gave him a quick hug and threw him a “See you later, little bro” before handing him over to Will Solace who was going to walk him to his cabin before there big, awkward, shitstorm of a talk.

“What was Reyna going on about?” Will started, practically as soon as Nico had shut the door. He stood, facing the door and away from Will for the longest time before turning around again. The boy sat on an armchair across from Nico’s bed where he used to sleep before Nico had told him that Hazel’s bed was fair game and she wouldn’t mind him sleeping on it. He had bags under his blood shocked eyes and was edgily picking at his skin. “Did I…hurt you, in anyway?”

The poor guy looked hurt and wounded like a tiny puppy whose tail had been stood on- in pain but ready to pay for a mistake that wasn’t his. Nico regarded puppy Will with curiosity, wondering how Reyna’s words had affected him to brink of sleep, he looked like he’d been awake for so long Nico could practically _smell_ the coffee from him.

“No” was all Nico said.

“Then what was Reyna talking about?” Asked Will, he laid his cheeks in both of his hands and looked at Nico with his round blue puppy eyes. If he was in fact a real puppy Nico thought he’d be a mix of a golden retriever and a husky, what a wonderfully beautiful crossbred he would be.

“She’s just being Reyna, yknow, she thinks she’s my Mom or something” Nico said lamely with an even worse shoulder shrug and sat himself down on his bed across from the son of Apollo.

“No, no. It’s more than that” Will said, shaking his head dramatically and tapping his foot along to a strange beat.

“No, t-that’s i-it” Nico stumbled, grasping his bed sheet with two hands as if he was going to fall of the very earth.

“No it’s more. I know you, and I know that you’re lying” Will assured them both sternly. This was something Nico had always been afraid off, someone knowing him, all the parts of him to an extent that they knew when he was lying. In someone else’s eyes it was a close friendship, but for Nico it was a dooming fate, he would never be able to get away with what he wanted to when Solace could pick up on his lies like a lion going in for the kill.

“No, really t-that’s-”

“There’s more Nico, why aren’t you telling me what it is” Will snapped, standing off his chair. Whilst Nico stuttered and stumbled, Will remained strong and sure of himself. Nico was fire, stumbling around and changing direction, destroying everything in his way; Will was rain, a steady pour of it, straight down and saving everyone from Nico’s outburst.

“I’m gay!” Fire Nico suddenly yelled, he’d destroyed the whole camp with the fire he threw out.

“What?” Will tilted his head, his water was thrown from him to Nico but it wasn’t enough to stop what came next.

“And I sort of have a crush on you but I didn’t want it to be weird- weirder than usual at least, because you’re pretty weird and yknow pretty- oh my gods did I just say that, I did. Fuck” Nico cursed himself but he wasn’t finished yet, he couldn’t stop it, it all just came out, fire everywhere going where it wanted creating mass destruction. “And I kind of stopped wanting to be around you since a few days ago when I was hugging you and it was nice and I realised that I _wanted_ it, but I couldn’t have it but like it was right there. But I never wanted to tell you because there no way that you’d feel the same way and that would make it really _really_ awkward, even more awkward than this, and now I’ve told you and fuck dammit I need to stop speaking!” Nico finished in a growl at himself and slammed his fists down beside him on the soft covers but wished for a glass panel that would slice into his knuckles and release a steady stream of blood instead.

It was so silent that Nico swore he could hear the beating of Wills heart. He kept his eyes pointed at the ground but he could see and feel that Will was staring at him. He half expected the boy to run out the cabin and have a good laugh about it to everyone else.

“I think that was the most you’ve ever spoke” Will said, to break the silence.

“Shut...up, Solace” Nico gasped. It was going to be forever awkward, why hadn’t Nico kept his mouth shut. Will was going to end up going out with some beautiful girl, hades, maybe even an Aphrodite girl, and then Nico was going to have to watch with awkward sitting on one shoulder and despair clinging onto the other.

“Would you look at me, jeez” Will complained. Slowly, like a feral dog, Nico raised his head and looked at Will. He was smirking, not in a cruel way.

“I’m sorry, can we just forger I said anything, please” Nico asked desperately.

“No” Was all Will said.

“Please, come on, just forget what I said and we can go back to being friends” He practically begged.

“Nuh-uh” Will grinned. _This is it,_ Nico thought, _he’s going to beat me up_. He thought back to the other day when Percy had said “ _I’m pretty sure Nico could take Solace in a fight”_ and he knew, not in a conceited way, that he could indeed take Will in a fight. He was the definition of lover not a fighter, he was a medic, he rushed to help and not to injure, and Nico was everything he wasn’t. But he knew that if it came to a fight, he wouldn’t have it in him to move a piece of hair of his perfect head.

In a fight or flight movement Nico began to shift into the shadows.

“HEY! GET BACK HERE” Will yelled unthreateningly and jerked forward. “Please”

“I shouldn’t have said anything, just don’t hit me” Nico sighed as he rejected the shadow travel and stayed on his position, tightly sitting on the bed grasping his sheets in both hands.

Will walked closer to him with a bigger smirk than before and Nico was half sure he was about to bring out a scalpel and plunge it into his heart. But what came next was messy and clashing but was far from a dissection. “You, Nico di Angelo, are the most adorable thing I’ve ever seen” Will said and grabbed the other boys face.

There was this moment where they were both staring into each other’s eyes as Will kept his grip on Nico’s face. It was as if they were searching each other, looking into the very soul of the other boy. And then, when Nico was dizzy from anticipation, they both leaned forward near enough the same time and the earth was covered in fire and rain.

Will lips where soft, Nico thought as he parted his own lips to let Will in. His tongue was softer. It was messy, Nico was unexperienced and cursing his appeared young age, but it was perfect in its own way.

Will knew what to do, his hands that started on Nico’s cheek’s where now roaming down his body, to his back; pulling him closer, to his hips; giving them a pinch, and then to Nico’s butt.

He couldn’t say exactly what went wrong, the kiss never stopped being perfect, but Nico panicked. Will obviously was an expert, and Nico was some naïve little boy way over his head.

He pulled back, away from Will and the perfectness that had surrounded them and he saw a look of hurt and pain on the boy’s face before he ran. Nowhere to go but everywhere to feel like shit.

It was only a measly few minutes before Will found him. He was lying down beside the tree, _their_ tree where Nico had first allowed the concept of comfort. At first all Will done was lie down beside Nico.

“I’m sorry” Will turned his head and said to Nico.

“Why are you sorry?” Nico asked him, but kept his head staring up at the blue sky. A frantic grimace appeared on the boy’s face when the sun decided to spotlight the two boys and attack his eyes. A coincidence or Apollo cheering them on?

“I should have asked before I touched your butt” Will mumbled, lowering his head as if he had committed the ultimate sin.

“Jeez, Solace. You couldn’t exactly ask it into my mouth could you” Nico said, and shivered as he felt a sort of ghost kiss around his mouth. He ruined it, Will was perfect, everything was perfect except Nico. Fuck up, all day long, Nico.

“I shouldn’t have just done it, it was wrong” Will nodded his head and reached for the boy’s hand but at the last minute stopped.

“N-no…I uh…I liked it” Nico mumbled, very quietly and finished the shitty job Will had tried to do and grabbed the other boys hand. Through the corner of his eye he was able to see Solace giving him a toothy smile.

“Oh, well that’s…good, yeah good” Will said lamely. “But it’s okay to not want to be touched and you always need to have consent before touching someone or else someone could get hurt”

“Hades, Solace. That wasn’t why I…ran” Said Nico as he finally turned his head to look at the other boy. Will gave him another smile, a reward for such a tiny act of confidence.

“Oh?” Will asked.

“I ran because I’m…and you’re…” It was like a game of fill in the blanks for Will. Nico couldn’t bring himself to say the words.

“You’re what, and I’m what?” Laughed Will. Through their clasped hands Nico felt the vibration of Will’s laughter. It was nice.

“You’re so…experienced and I’m…not” Nico said and turned his body round so that he couldn’t see Will and Will couldn’t see Nico’s red and disgusting face. He still kept a hold of the boy’s hand though.

“Hey, hey come back here you!” Will giggled, actually _giggled_ and Nico thought it was the cutest thing he’d ever heard.

Slowly, and unsubtly Nico turned his body around. A soft sensation ran over him and Nico realised that it was Will, running his thumb across the back of his hand.

“You didn’t seem inexperienced” Will told him with a smirk. “For me, that kiss was the best thing I’ve ever felt. Ever. In my whole entire life” He said dramatically. Nico was able to huff out a laugh. “For me, it was perfect. And I know that for me, I didn’t want it do end, and I’d defiantly like more of it” Nico heard the theatrical tone of ‘For me’ every time he said it.

“The same…for me” Nico agreed.

“Well then. That’s it settled” Will nodded.

“What…I don’t know…what you mean” Nico stumbled. _So inexperienced,_ he thought, _so fucking inexperienced._

“I am going to take you on a date” Will told him, with a small flirty smile.

“I guess that would be okay” Nico nodded, he would have tried a flirty smile but he knew he’d end up looking like he was having a seizure instead, so he just gave returned it with a small boring smile.

They sat, in silence but it was a loud silence full of confidence, fire and rain, comfort and ease. Their hands still clasped together, neither boy caring about the collective sweat it was creating. Their tree was far enough away that no campers disturbed them, but close enough to camp that the feeling of home still radiated. In that moment, and so many moments after it, Nico had never felt more at home.

At one point Nico shuffled closer to Will, and closer, shuffle shuffle shuffle.

“Can I help you?” Will asked sarcastically as he looked down at him, smirking. Always smirking.

Nico made an unintelligent noise and shuffled once again.

“Can I help you?” Will repeated.

“Don’t give me another consent touch lecture and just put your arms around me, asshole” Nico mumbled.

Will gave him a grin before raising an arm over his head and putting it onto Nico’s shoulder, pulling him closer to Nico’s head now laid on top of Will’s chest.

Earlier in the room Nico had thought he heard Will’s heartbeat through the silence, and now again he could defiantly hear it. The beautiful beat, so musical, so swift, of a boy that hadn’t rejected him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Seems a bit rushed but love always is my friends.   
> Don't listen to me I talk bullshit.  
> New chapter in a couple of days!


	12. We'll leave this crowded room

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Are we together? Like together together?” He asked, and Nico had to let out a laugh at his need to pointlessly emphasise words.
> 
> “Yes” Nico told him, leaning down. “We fucking are” He added with a smile before lightly kissing the other boys nose. Will closed his eyes and let out a soft sigh.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yeah, its just a given by now I don't actually proof read my work. Sorry this ones a little fast and confusing but the next couple of chapters will sort it out ;)

“What are we?” Will asked one morning after breakfast. They lay at their tree, together, perfectly together, a couple of days after their first kiss.

Nico raised his head from its position on Wills chest to look at him. “What do you mean?”

“Like…what _are_ we” He repeated. His long blonde eyelashes shone out in the sun, like that was what they were made for, attracting the light.

“That’s right, Solace. Emphasising the word ‘are’ really explains to me what you mean” Laughed Nico, dumping his head back on Will’s chest playfully. The boy made an ‘oomph’ sound.

“Like, are we…friends…really good friends…other…things” The son of Apollo was drowning and desperately reaching for Nico but the whole encounter was too amusing to stop. Nico trapped a smile and kept playing.

“Other things?” He asked, seemingly emotionlessly.

“Yeah like…like…yknow” _drowning, oh so drowning_ , Nico thought as the boy spoke, his voice trembling. “Like how people are friends but they’re…more than friends. Are we _that_ or are we- ARE YOU LAUGHING AT ME?” Will suddenly yelped as he felt the vibrating feeling of Nico’s soft laughter on his chest.

“Oh gods, no” Nico said in between laughs. “That…that was amusing as fuck, I really have to say”

“I feel very dishonoured here” Will said and jabbed the other boy in the side. This created what can only be called a very cute and fun wrestling match that ending with Nico pinning Will down, with his arms holding his hands down, his legs beside his waist and his feet holding down the other boys feet.

“Do you want to ask the question now?” Nico smirked, trying to keep it fun and playful but both boys stared at each other, eyes wide, pupils dilated, sweat, red faces and brushing against each other.

“Are we together? Like _together_ together?” He asked, and Nico had to let out a laugh at his need to pointlessly emphasise words.

“Yes” Nico told him, leaning down. “We fucking are” He added with a smile before lightly kissing the other boys nose. Will closed his eyes and let out a soft sigh.

“Good” Will said opened his blue eyes, positioning them right at Nico.

“Good” Nico agreed and rolled of the other boy and onto the floor beside him. Hand found hand, and fingers clasped.

There was shuffling in the trees behind them but Nico simply noted it down as Nymphs, no other camper had ever been spotted near their tree. It wasn’t by any description an extraordinary tree, it was mundane in every with its brown peeling trunk, branches in every direction sprouting vibrant green leaves and the occasional brown one. It wasn’t a special tree, but it was _their_ special tree. They found a blissful harmony in lying beside the tree, together.

“Are you going to stay here?” Will asked, in a soft quiet almost hesitant voice. His hands absentmindedly twiddled with Nico’s, twisting them and clasping them.

“Well, eventually I have to go spend some time with Hazel and Frank and Reyna before they leave” Said Nico. His sister and friends would be leaving in 4 days and he knew that he wasn’t ready for it. The enjoyment he felt at having all his friends together was so large and extent that the downfall of it, would also be.

“Well, yeah but that’s…not what I meant” Will mumbled, tapping a beat onto the tip of Nico’s thumb nails. The atmosphere between the two of them turned uneasy, Nico didn’t like it.

“What did you mean then” He asked and sat up, leaning his back on the trunk of their tree. Bark jabbed into his back in an aching, but pleasant way. _Aching and pleasant, sore and pleasing. Oh how he missed it._ It had been so long since he welcomed the bite of a razor, the crunch of his knuckles, so long and so far away, out of reach. He didn’t want it back, and yet he did. There was always a slight longing for pain inside of him, always there, never absent. Somewhere he knew he was doing the right thing by ignoring the longing but somewhere, in the darkest part of his mind it seemed to be the one thing he was missing.

“Camp Half-blood, are you going to stay here” The son of Apollo cautiously asked, for once being the one who avoided eye contact as he stared at Nico’s black vans on his feet.

“I already said I was, didn’t i?”

“Yeah but, for how long” Will mumbled.

“For as long as you are” Nico answered, very, very quietly, but he knew Will could hear it. He was still slightly embarrassed about affection, showing it, giving it, and receiving it- embarrassed. It was more than a red face and sweaty palms, it was that voice in his head saying ‘ _you’re doing it wrong’_. That ever present and persistent voice, that was more than always right.

Will’s mouth quirked up on the left side more than the right to create an adorable floppy grin as he raised his head to look at the other boy. The air was warm around them but a strong breeze pushed at Nico’s back making his roll on top of Will, it was such a powerful breeze that lead Nico to believe it wasn’t a breeze at all and the wind nymphs where enjoying their day with some juvenile games.

Will grabbed the crook of Nico’s elbows and held him there.

Blissful silence surrounded them and held them there together. Peaceful, quiet, comfortable, idyllic-

“I love you” The son of Apollo whispered into his ear.

_No­._

Nico ran, as fast as his little legs could take him, through the tree that weren’t theirs, through the camp and into his cabin, a few tears blurred his eyes. Hazel sat on her bed, in a camp Jupiter tshirt and cute little dungarees with her mane of hair tied into a bulging knot, her gold eyes were bloodshot and puffy around the flesh and she blew her nose into a tissue. The two siblings looked at each other for a minute, before collapsing onto Hazels bed together, clutching one another’s arms as they shared a stream of tears.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry?


	13. Don't be scared

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “You need to talk to him, sort it out” She told her brother, still grasping his cold hand sternly.
> 
> “Yeah” He breathed out deeply and rested his head on hers.
> 
> “I can be your flower girl” She told him and jabbed him in the side of his stomach, not violently but like two puppies playing, they evolved into fits of giggles.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> as always, I did not prof read, opps?

“So what happened to you?” Hazel asked her brother when they finished crying. They lay clutching each other, leaning on the wall beside Hazels bed, soaked in tears not knowing if it was their own. Hazel had only been in her cabin for about five minutes, having her one person pity party and crying her eyes out, before her brother came running in with those wide deer in a headlight eyes rimming with tears that dripped down his cheeks.

“No, you first” Nico prompted. She laid her head on the creek of his neck, the embrace so natural and comforting. His arm lay on the side of her shoulder, strong but light at the same time, two words she would use to describe her brother but he would object to.

She took in a wavering breath and in a broken voice said “Frank and I had a fight”

“What about?” Nico asked as he brought up a hand to smooth down her mane of frizzy hair. It’s moments like this she feels so thankful for a brother, after the fight she debated going to see Piper in the Aphrodite cabin for the love advice, or Annabeth in the Athena cabin for some logic, but in the end she went to her own cabin to be alone, but she knew that it was because her brother would eventually be there. Her sweet, underestimated, misunderstood, loving brother.

“I wanted to stay here longer, he wanted to go home” She said. _Well, maybe you should stay here alone!_ He had yelled, and the fight ended in them yelling ‘fine’ at each other, as most lover quarrels do.

“Oh, Hazel” Nico sighed and rested a hand on her knee.

“I get that he’s a praetor but this is our family here, Nico. A couple of weeks aren’t enough.” She cried put a hand over his hand on her knee, their hands clasped together.

“Families are always families. No matter where you are, no matter how far away” Nico told her and placed a soft kiss on her head. She felt the tingle through her hair and sighed, _What would I do without you?_

“I guess but…I always feel left out now yknow. It’s just me Frank and Reyna, and yeah we made more friends but, you guys are all here” She snivelled, she would have worried that she was getting snot and tears over Nico’s shoulder but, he was her brother, he wouldn’t care.

“Don’t get me wrong Haze, we miss you guys like hell, but that’s your home over there” He told her. When did he grow up? When did he stop being the broken boy who hated the world, hated everything, and turned into this…man? She never told him one of the main reasons she wanted to stay was to keep an eye on him and make sure he was okay, didn’t tell him she knew, didn’t tell him she had saw the pink fleshy scars that inhibited his body. At least they were scars, she had thought, scars are better than wounds. In that moment, she knew he would be okay, he had someone that was helping him other than her, that was obvious. Maybe Jason, he loved him like a little brother. Or maybe Will Solace, his obvious admirer.

“I don’t like fighting with him”

“Your first fight?” He guessed. It wasn’t their first fight really, they had argued a lot before, but it was the first time they walked away from each other and didn’t automatically forgive and forget. _Fine!_ Is it Frank? Where was he now, she wondered, with Percy or Jason, or sulking himself.

“Yeah,” She mumbled, “I don’t like it”

“I know you guys” He promised, “You’ll make up”

“Yeah, yeah… we will” She sighed, she believed it. She had to. When you’ve been through _that_ much together, you had to believe it. Once she thought her life would be as simple as growing up and marrying Sammy and she would have accepted it, but _Frank,_ sweet, awkward, adorable and beautiful Frank. He was her destiny and fate, he was _hers,_ and vice versa.

“I’m your flower boy remember” He joked. She let out a breathy laugh which he returned, sending a spark down her body.

“You’ll have to visit after summer,” She told her brother and rubbed her thumb over his hand “You could bring Will as well” She knew she’d messed up as soon as she said his name, his whole body tensed up.

He muttered an unintelligent noise and shifted his weight, Hazel raised her head and steadied her body, looking him right in the eye. The tears were back, glistering in his eyes but he didn’t let them fall.

“What?” She asked. “What happened between you two?”

“We uh…em…”

“Nico, it’s me. You can tell me anything!” She promised him and grabbed both his hands in hers. Hiding, he was hiding from her.

Taking a big sturdy breath her brother looked her in the eye and said “I’m gay” like he’d practiced it in the mirror repeatedly.

“Okay” She prompted, ready to get to the part that was eating him.

“Okay?” He asked bewildered.

“Yes, okay. It’s not a big deal” She shrugged her shoulders. She knew why he thought it would be a big deal, the times they came from it wasn’t a pretty time to be gay. But now was different, and Hazel had never been one of those people who found gay any different from straight. People were people and monsters were monsters, sexuality didn’t come into play.

“Really?” He asked her, a lone tear sailing down his cheeks that she could see finally got there colour back. Someone had been taking care of him, and she was so glad to see it.

“Really” She promised with a smile. “What happened with Will, Nico”

“He’s also…yknow…gay” He still said the word with an almost accusing and hateful tone of voice, it was hard for him, she could see, coming from the time he did. “And we were…together and it was…good, I guess”

“And?” she encouraged.

“And,” He started slowly, “then he said he loved me”

“That’s…bad?”

“It…too soon” He corrected. “And it’s too wrong. I’m a son of Hades, he’s a son of Apollo. Dark and light Hazel, dark and light” he sighed and rested his head on the wall, she put her head back on his neck again.

“I see it, yknow,” She told him. “It’s not wrong Nico. Maybe, it’s too soon, but it’s not wrong. He makes you happy too”

“Well…yeah”

“You need to talk to him, sort it out” She told her brother, still grasping his cold hand sternly.

“Yeah” He breathed out deeply and rested his head on hers.

“I can be your flower girl” She told him and jabbed him in the side of his stomach, not violently but like two puppies playing, they evolved into fits of giggles.

“Knock knock?” Came Frank’s deep questioning voice at the cabin door. He stood, slouched, with his muscles showing through the tight beige tshirt. It wasn’t the look of Frank she had fell in love with, when he’d changed after his blessing she held a slight longing for his old chubby baby face but she’d grown to admire his now well-structured face and body, but no, what she fell in love with was his spirit and kind nature. He was so perfect to her.

“Frank” Nico drawled and nodded his head, long locks of dark hair falling into his face, he really could do with a haircut, she or Reyna would give him one soon or at least tell him to tie it off his face.

“You could punch me in the face, if you wanted to” Frank stammered.

 _If you hurt her, Zhang, I’ll skin you,_ her brother had once promised but he only smiled and told him, “Nah I’m good. You’re here to fix it”

“Yeah,” Frank breathed out like he had finally gotten rid of a weight on his chest, “I am”

“I’ll leave you guys to it” Hazel’s brother said and pushed himself of her bed, leaving her. It was obvious that he was being taken care of, he had definitely gained a few pounds but he was still so skinny and frail.

“You’re going to fix your problem too, Nico?” Hazel asked, but it was mostly an order. He gave her a small, sad smile with a nod of his head before he walked to the door of the cabin, before he could leave Frank put a large hand on his shoulder.

“Maybe we could play Mythomagic before I leave?”

“I’ll hold you to that” Nico smiled and walked out.

“Is he okay?” Frank enquired, still standing at the door. Frantically, she moved to put the toilet paper she and Nico had used as hankies into the bin, Franks eyes followed her.

“He will be”

“Was he crying?”

“Yes” She slumped back onto her position on the bed.

“Were you?” He asked and finally moved forward, he stopped at the edge of her bed where Nico had been sitting, when Hazel nodded her he sat down.

“Yes” She answered, with a sniff to prove it.

“Im sorry, Haze, you know I’d love to sta-”

“I get it” She said, not unkindly, and nodded her head. The mop of curly hair on top of her head was tied too tight and was starting to give her a migraine so she reached up to take it out.

Frank reached his tone arm up to scratch his neatly cut hair and said “If you wanted to yknow…stay her for a few more weeks then you could…I’d be okay with that I guess”

“I’m not going anywhere without you” She told him, how could he be so stupid to think otherwise. They were more than a couple, they were now latched together, in all senses. Where there was Hazel, there was Frank, vice versa.

“Good” Frank rushed to say, “That’s good”

She was still working on her hair, the band now stuck in the curls, she yanked it a few times but the pain was too great to get it out with a simple pull. “Uh, Frank. Could you lend me a hand here?”

“What? Oh yeah, sure!” He said as she turned her head round, he put both hands on her head and move them about wildly before finding the bobble, “I’m gonna have to just try to snap it” He warned her. She briefed herself for the pain but when she heard the snap it was painless, she breathed out and so did he.

“Thanks” Said Hazel, even managing a small laugh.

“I am sorry” Her boyfriend reminded her.

“It’s over now, Frank. We’re fine. We’re good” She promised and dropped her head onto his lap. He smoothed down her wild hair both their breathing fell into sync.

She relaxed into the comfort, but let her mind wander on her brother and Will Solace and what they were doing that minute.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'll try to post soon! the chapters are getting less detailed and shit, sorry


	14. Running out of ways to run

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Although Nico was willing to run from life the thought of leaving Will was always acting as a barricade, he never wanted to be without him even though he knew it was best for him. Selfishness now possessed him and for as long as Will Solace seemed happy to be near him, he would cling on. In that moment he promised himself that that was the last time he would ever run from Will Solace.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I actually prof read this, but there's probably still some corrections needing to be made.

As he slowly dragged his feet through the grounds of camp half-blood Nico made his plan, he would go see Will, explain why things happened the way they did, apologise and then made the rest of the plan up through adrenaline of the moment. But, as always, Nico’s plans never go the way they should and he bumped into Will. _Literally bumped._

“Hades, watch where you’re going” He said absentmindedly as he rubbed his forehead that had connected with a rock-solid chest, he looked up to see what kind of idiot had knocked into him to see the haunted face of Will Solace. _Oh great_.

“Sorry” Will murmured and scratched the tip of his nose, not in the act of itching but in the way that boys do when their either trying to looked tough or are in an awkward situation.

“Uh…no no…my fault” Nico quickly rushed out and self-consciously raised a shaky hand to wipe any lingering tears than showed on his face, he could feel the dampness and hated that Will could probably see he had been crying but he knew anyway that at this point Will knew him well enough to know he was upset without any visual evidence.

“Can we, uh, can we talk?” Will nervously asked and gestured with his thumb to his right and to their tree.

“Yeah” sighed Nico as he took the lead, shuffling his little legs across the grass, looking at anything he possibly could other than the boy beside him. In a split second his plan totally left him, he couldn’t remember anything he wanted to say or do and he was unquestionably full of adrenaline.

In silence they ventured into the trees until they found theirs and threw themselves down in front of it a couple of noticeable feet apart from each other.

“Did you…uh…when you ran did you…yknow?”

“Hazel was there, we just talked” Nico said, subtly telling the other boy he had not self-harmed. Funny that he didn’t even think about, the thought never so much as hovered over him. He was so fixated on his belief of Will lying to him about his feelings and about how stupid he is for always running that he never stopped to think that he could have calmed himself with the bite of a razor. Nico didn’t know if he was happy or angry with himself.

“That’s really good” Will told him, looking up at the boy with the smallest smile he’d ever given him.

“Mhhh” Was all Nico mumbled.

“I’m sorry if I scared you, but I have this thing where I can’t keep my emotions in” said Will as he fidgeted with the grass, soon there’d be some pretty pissed of nymphs and no grass around their tree by the amount of nervous pulling that goes on. “I’m totally okay if you don’t feel the same, it doesn’t make me love you any less”

Nico flinched and tried to think something up in his head but all he came up with was “That’s not why I ran” and was hit with some pretty big déjà vu. How many times was he going to fuck up and fuck off running from Will Solace?

“Can you tell me why you ran then? Please, Nicholas” Will begged using his whole name and looking at him with those sweet blue eyes. The use of his full first name was probably meant to evoke seriousness but it felt ridiculous to Nico, no one but his mother and occasionally Bianca had ever used it, all it personified was a little boy who was annoying and immensely obsessed with mythomagic and that wasn’t who he was anymore (he was only a little obsessed with mythomagic now)

“You can’t…feel that way about me” Nico said, only know seeing the ludicrousness of telling another how they feel, but it was more in a logical way, it wasn’t possible that sweet, considerate, Doctor Will could feel such strong emotions towards an awkward cutter boy. It wasn’t feasible.

“I would never lie to you, Nico. And especially about this” Will told him in a stern voice. Statistically what Will was saying sounded right, he would never lie or joke about anything that could turn around to hurt something, that just wasn’t who he was, but maybe Nico thought of it as a lie only because that’s what he wanted it to be.

“It’s just…it’s too much” Nico whispered.

“I get that, but im not asking you to feel the same wa-”

“No, look Will I mean it’s too much for you okay. You’re a healer, a son of Apollo, you’re sunny and cheery and _happy_. I would _ruin_ you, I’m the sun of Hades! Bringer of death and devastation, not someone’s loving boyfriend” Nico nervously snapped at Will, his voice getting deeper and louder and his heart got faster and rawer.

“Hey, shut up” Will snapped back, “Your godly parent doesn’t define you. Look at me, im shit at singing and I can only shoot an arrow with my dad or aunties blessing” when Nico opened his mouth to tell him to stop being so hard on himself and tell him he was an amazing healer and had the pretty cool skill of audiokinesis, Will shushed him. “You aren’t just a son of Hades, what defines you is your soul and spirit and I can see how stunning they are!”

Nico wriggled his body self-consciously and tried to string up a sentence, “I’d ruin everything you are, everything you stand for”

“What does that even mean?” Will asked, wildly moving his arms in craze gestures.

“You try to stop death, I embrace it. You heal, I deliberately hurt” Nico eventually came up with and finally looked the boy in the eye, he wished he hadn’t so he wasn’t able to see Will Solace crying. In that moment he’d never wanted to hug the boy more but he knew he had to stand his ground, Will was better without him, everyone was.

“Even you’re Dad found love Nico” Will said, and it was some pretty sound evidence for convincement, if the Lord of the Underworld was loved by someone like Persephone then why couldn’t Nico fall in love with a son of Apollo. But in the end it wasn’t about love, it was about destruction and Nico would destroy Will Solace and suffocate his beautiful self in darkness.

“Everyone who loves me dies” whispered Nico.

"Nico” Will whispered back and outstretched a hand to his shoulder but he shrank back, shadows pushed their way to him and surrounded him.

“Everything I touch is cursed to die sooner or later. Anyone who loves me dies" Nico cried, tears racing down his face followed by another set. The shadows didn’t surround him anymore because he _was_ a shadow, that’s all he was, a shadow. That’s what he was destined to be, no one was ever supposed to be close to him but he was stupid enough to allow Will so nuzzle his way in.

“Nico, hey come on. That’s not true” Will told him as he pushed himself up to hands and knees, leaning towards Nico with extensive frightened eyes. “Please come back to me. Please Nico” Will begged, holding his own race of tears. Each boy shook with either fear or sadness or a perfect mix of both as they tried to save each other. That’s all they ever tried to do, save each other but not themselves.

“You need to leave Will, you _need_ to. Because this is the only time I’ll be strong enough to ask you, okay. I ran because you deserve someone who can say the words back, someone who can be with you and be _free_ with you” Nico exclaimed as he continued to embrace the darkness and the shadows, allowing himself to become the shadow. “You have to go now, or else I’ll be too selfish to ask again”

“I won’t leave you, Nico. Not today, not tomorrow, not ever. You’re so stupid! All I need is you!” Yelled Will, pushing himself off his knees to a full standing position and walking closer to Nico. He outstretched his hand and laid it on Nico’s cheek, a mixture of tears and shadows brushed over it and gave him a tingling feeling all around his body. “I don’t care about three little words, you idiot. I care about you and I care about _us_ and it doesn’t bother me who does or doesn’t know”

“You’re better off without me” Nico said and closed his eyes but leaned into Wills touch.

“No, I’m not. You don’t understand how long I’ve waited for you to even let me be this close to you, how long I’ve wished I could even think about calling you mine, di Angelo” Will told him, shaking his head and watching for the corner of his eye as the tears fell of his cheek and sunk to the ground. “Maybe we’re both selfish, that just means we deserve each other”

The two boys made a startled noise as the shadows left Nico, he hadn’t even meant to scrap them meaning they either rejected him or he subconsciously let them go.

“I’m not easy to be with” Nico said, looking at Will with soft eyes and red cheeks.

“Tell me something I don’t know, zombie dude”

“And on some days you’re going to want to punch me in the face”

“Just some days?” Will asked and sunk down onto the ground beside Nico, neither boy breaking the eye contact but holding it fiercely.

“And I’m new to it all”

“That’s fine”

“Why do you even want to be with me” Nico asked.

“You’re small, I like that. You’re extremely cute, powerful and kind even if you don’t see it. You don’t give up, even after all that time you suffered alone you never gave up. You don’t see how strong you are, how brave and amazing you are. But I do” Will told him and grabbing both his hands he raised them to his both to place his lips onto them.

“This is your last chance to save yourself, Solace” Nico warned a look of lust clear in his eyes.

“Im not going anywhere” Will promised and both boys merged into one, arms snaked around waists, hair flew into hair and breath mingled together.

Although Nico was willing to run from life the thought of leaving Will was always acting as a barricade, he never wanted to be without him even though he knew it was best for him. Selfishness now possessed him and for as long as Will Solace seemed happy to be near him, he would cling on. In that moment he promised himself that that was the last time he would ever run from Will Solace.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you liked the chapter, should update within a week.


	15. Call me wild, drinking up the sunshine, be my man and show me what it feels like

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> All he wanted was to take Nico’s pain away from him and give it to someone who deserved it. So many monsters and monstrous people got away with murder, literally, and here was a hero who is so broken by the whole he gets harmed by the fragments. But there was no way to do that and he was stuck putting Band-Aids on a growing hole.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have not prof read, as always.  
> okay I think I kinda messed everything up but like...idk.   
> should I stop?

Time went fast, the campers from Camp Jupiter left with tears and hugs, Nico tried to stay strong but with Hazel crying on one shoulder and Reyna sniveling on his other he had to let out a few tears. Will stayed in Hazel’s bed that night, or at least he was supposed to be sleeping on Hazel’s bed but Nico had convinced him to sleep in his bed. With him.

Ever since they smoothened out their relationship the son of Hades had been a prisoner of touch. Every random moment they were alone Nico would find a way to touch Will which made a change from Will having to stalk and tackle him. Absent minded hair ruffles to soft pecks on the skin, this was a new Nico.

There was no new scars on his body, or fresh unhappy tears, he was seemingly happy. But Will knew as a doctor and a Nico di Angelo expert that he was on the road to getting better, he wasn’t safe yet.

Will has got his hand on every depression help book he could find and spent hours of his free time trying to find a solution to his problem. He’d never dealt with anything like this before, sure a few times he helped kids with wound they made on their own, he kept their secrets confidential and always checked up on them but they all proved to be isolated incidents.

All he wanted was to take Nico’s pain away from him and give it to someone who deserved it. So many monsters and monstrous people got away with murder, literally, and here was a hero who is so broken by the whole he gets harmed by the fragments. But there was no way to do that and he was stuck putting Band-Aids on a growing hole.

“You know, if you keep thinking so hard you might just explode” A hoarse voice drawled, cutting him off his train of thought.

A black mop of hair popped itself out of the covers and brown doe eyes started into him. He was so beautiful in the morning; he was beautiful all the time but especially in the morning. He wasn’t an early riser so it was always bright when he woke up and his eyes flickered and twitched as the sun danced upon him. Not unattractively lay some drool on the corner of his mouth which he hastily wiped on the corner of his pillow.  

“Is that so?” Will asked and looked down at his boyfriend admiringly.

“Mmhh hmm” Nico smiled back and shuffled his body over closer. Finishing the process Will laid beside him and pulled the boy closer, with a pleasing sigh Nico rested his head in the middle of his bare chest. “What were you thinking about?”

“You, always you” said Will as he reached up a hand and gently massaged Nico’s head who let out what could only be called a purr.

“Good things?”

“Of course” Will smiled and pinched his boyfriend’s ear who let out a halfhearted yelp. “Mostly the pleasing noises you make whilst sleeping, thinking of me?”

“Shut up you loser” he squealed and hit Will in the face with a spare pillow creating a mini war of play fighting and giggling.

“Truce, truce!” He eventually shrieked when Nico sat on top of him with his legs at his sides tickling Will.

“Yeah, you better give up” Nico laughed huskily but didn’t get up.

Nico’s laughter evened out and the two boys stared into each other’s eyes, tearing each other apart and searching deeply. Will gulped and put both of his hands softly on Nico’s waist, Nico rolled his hips backwards, Will felt the movement tingle all over his body and was ready to feel more when someone knocked on the cabin door, Will had never felt so ready to fucking murder another human being before.

They both let out girly shrieks as they bounced away from each other like one of them had caught on fire.

“Where is your tshirt” Nico fiercely whispered and jumped up from the bed, tearing his room apart in the search for Wills clothes. He stayed on the bed knowing if he moved to far there was a chance whoever was at the door would be able to see him.

“I don’t know”

“Get under the covers!”

“What?!”

“I said get under the covers!” Nico whisper spat and practically stuffed Will under his sheets and suffocated him.

“Pushy” Will huffed and straightened himself out to avoid looking like he was indeed a half-naked person hiding from embarrassment. It was too hot under the covers, so stuffy he could feel himself about to start sweating, as a son of Apollo he was proud to say that he usually didn’t sweat, and now he was going to be taken out by bed covers because Nico was too scared to let people know they were together. To be fair it was also technically against the rules, but not really since they were both male and there was no specific rule stating the two campers of the _same_ gender couldn’t sleep in each other’s cabins.

“Come in!” Nico squawked and sat down on the bed and right on top of Will’s groin with only bed covers to separate them. He let out a huff of protest but Nico wiggled his bony butt on top of Will’s lap, if he actually knew what body part he was sitting on then he was the ultimate tease and Will was going to have to repay him for it.

“Morning Nico!” A voice happily yelled. It was obviously Jason Grace, not only was his voice clearly detectable but who else would be knocking on Nico’s door at this time than his sort of adoptive big brother.

“Gah” Nico answered back and twisted his butt on top of Will’s crotch. _He is so dead_ , Will cursed as he gritted his teeth.

“Have you spoke to Annabeth recently?”

“Uh…last nigh-”

“I mean about capture the flag” Jason rapidly cut Nico of his sentence with an enquiry.

“No?” Nico told him.

“Okay, you should totally be with me and Percy for capture the flag, the big three together” Jason said excitedly. Everyone thought it wasn’t really fair if the big three were together, they’d be near impossible to beat, but they never really cared and mostly always went in the same time, especially since there was only one of them in each cabin. “So don’t let Annabeth take you away!”

“Yeah, sure” Nico said nonchalantly and magnanimously.

“Yes!” Jason boomed and gave Nico a quick –what sounded like- high five. “Okay, I’ll see you at breakfast little bro”

“Yeah yeah, see you” Nico mumbled.

Jason opened the door but Will was still aware of him being in the room. Nico nervously wriggled his butt on top of Will’s lap area once again and Will swore to the Gods he was going to lose it.

“Oh, also, by the way Will we are against your cabin so prepare to lose” Jason said, probably with a massive grin on his face before closing the cabin door.

Complete silence filled the cabin until Will gently pushed Nico off him and emerged from under the covers. Nico didn’t look like he was going to dive for a razor, so that was good, but he did look slightly spooked.

“Hey, it’s okay. You heard him, he found the whole thing very amusing” Will said and put his hand on Nico’s check, it wasn’t pale anymore but it wasn’t quite the tanned color it was supposed to be.

“Yeah…I know. It’s weird” Nico mumbled, not looking at his boyfriend but instead focusing on the door Jason had just exited from.

“Weird?” He prompted.

“It’s like he didn’t even care…like it was normal” Nico said and cutely scrunched up his dark eyebrows.

Will let out a small laugh, “it is normal, we’re teenagers. Teenagers do shit like this. Two boys, a boy and a girl, two girls. It’s all normal”

“Yeah” Nico whispered and then smiled a little and said again “Yeah!” But louder and finally looking at his boyfriend. “We do need to work on our hiding skills though”

“Yeah we do” Laughed Will as he leaned his head on Nico’s forehead. The younger boy closed his eyes and breathed in.

“Thank you” Nico whispered.

“What for?”

“For being here” said Nico as he moved forward and places a small short kiss on Will’s lips. It was the most PG rated kiss they’d had but it was also the sweetest and held the most emotion. When he pulled away they laid there foreheads together for a few minutes, just breathing together and being together and being in a _good_ place together. It was bliss.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> everything kinda seems messy and uncalled for but tbh that's how mental disorders work sometimes.  
> Does anyone want me to keep going or have I totally ruined the fic?


	16. Fall, fall, let it all go fess up you already know that oh, you’re running out of reasons

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “We’ll do more than hold him captive for just tonight!” Will decided as he stood in front of him, Annabeth pulled her head up again and jumped down from the tree in on fluent and swift motion.
> 
> “You’d love to hold him captive wouldn’t you Will” A voice yelled from the tree’s followed by a few cat calls in different directions.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Last chapter guys, thanks for the ride.

“Is this the walk of shame? I really hope it’s not” Jason smirked as Nico sat down beside him for breakfast. A few tables away Will sat with his siblings, trying to stop a fight over who was the best archer but ending up with a piece of cereal launched at his face. He loved Hazel with all his heart and she was all he needed really, but he had always wondered what a whole cabin of siblings was like. He and Jason both wondered that probably.

“It’s not the walk of shame, jeez” Nico huffed as he sipped his drink.

“Good, because you’re still a kid”

“I’m technically older than you” He pointed out angrily. His friends always forgot that Hazel and he very older than all of them, combined.

“No no, you’re just a little thing” Jason cooed.

“I want to kill you in so many ways”

“With kindness?” Jason asked with a grin. Nico couldn’t help but let out a snort.

“Uh…you haven’t you know…”

“Told anyone? No I haven’t, but really everyone knows” Jason said and stuffed his spoon and cereal into his big gob, completely oblivious to Nico’s surprise and discomfort.

“What?!” Shrieked Nico, his spoon clanging together with his bowl, and making a loud piercing noise.

“Yeah I mean, it’s quite obvious”

Nico looked behind him, all around him, to see if anyone was listening, Piper caught his eye and gave him a little salute before turning around to answer one of her siblings but no one else seemed to be paying attention to Jason and him. “What do you mean it’s quite obvious?”

“Well from what Travis told me it’s like when Percy and Annabeth weren’t together but everyone knew they were going to be” Jason started and twirled his spoon around in the air, Nico could feel himself blushing. He knew Travis, both him and his brother of course, but they weren’t exactly _friends_ , and if someone he wasn’t friends with knew that he and Will were together, or crushing on each other, then he obviously wasn’t very good at keeping secrets. “So really everyone’s just waiting for the underwater kiss”

“What?”

“Well, none of you are children of Poseidon so just any kind of visual evidence is what they want” Jason nodded and thankfully stuffed cereal into his mouth in favor of speaking.

“No one has a… _problem_ with it?”

“Nico, we’re all outcasts here. Half in the real world half in the gods world, none of us fit in. You really think anyone here’s going to have a problem with you and Will over a tiny insignificant detail” Jason sighed, rolling his eyes and staring at Nico as if he was some tiny child asking a stupid question. “I mean they more like have the problem of you being a child of death, but I think they got over it” He added, not unkindly. It took Nico a while but he found out that Jason was never harsh but he spoke his mind and was confused if you didn’t as well, which was fine and well with Nico, there was never any bullshit between the two, no pretending.

“I guess…that sorta makes sense”

“My only problem with you is your continuous need to degrade yourself” He said and finished off his cereal with a small smile, showing it was all play. “Also you need a haircut”

* * *

 

“Percy, you’re not allowed to be a part of making the plans. You’re plan A would mean Nico would be captured, you’re plan B means Annabeth would skewer me and you’re plan C sounds like a toddler made it” Jason sighed and smoothed out his hair harshly, his eyebrows raising up at the movement.

“It’s okay bro, there’s like 28 more letters to use!” Percy nodded. Nico sighed and looked at Jason, both of them wearing faces of annoyance and amusement hidden deep.

“We may as well walk out with our hands up if Percy’s planning things” Dan, a son of Hermes yelled out.

“Oh I’m sorry Dan, how much time did you survive in Tartarus with your wonderful plans?” Percy sarcastically asked before huffing at him and turning away, he'd use his Tartarus card for as long as he lived Nico thought..

The big three, Hermes cabin, Iris cabin, Hypnos cabin (who weren’t much use), Aphrodite Cabin (who most of were even less use) and Hephaestus Cabin had all teamed up with each other, it was a great mix with brilliant fighters but they were against Athena of logic, Apollo of bows and arrows and Ares of brutality amongst others. If they didn’t have a good plan then they were definitely fucked.

“So that’s the plan, sounds easy enough” Connor shrugged and grinned at his brother with a hint of mischief.

“It won’t be easy, that’s the point” Nico rolled his eyes and gave Jason and Percy the fist bump they were waiting for. They had made their plan, and he had made his.

Percy, Nico and Jason ventured in front of the rest, Jason in the air vouching for the element of surprise and Percy ducking behind tree’s as if that could save him and Nico travelled through the spaces of shadows he could find. Their plan was on track, and so was his.

One minute the big three happily and secretly travelled forward from their squad and then the next Jason cried out as an arrow safely nipped past his arm making him plummet to the ground in fright, he caught himself near the bottom and landed beside Nico panting.

“Plan…not…easy” Jason wheezed. Half-heartedly Nico gave him a pat on the back.

Percy clicked Riptide and grabbed the sword proudly for only a few seconds before another arrow flew from seemingly nowhere and knocked the sword out of its owner’s hands securely.

“Nico, run or shadow travel back and tell them to wait, weapons ready” Percy whispered, hesitantly and slowly picking up his now closed pen like there was a feral animal watching him, they had no clue who the fire of arrows belonged to, no clue where they came from other than in the tree’s and with just three of them it wasn’t wise to go and check, a whole army of archers could be waiting to capture them.

“You got it, boss” Nico sighed and rolled his eyes. In short movements, maybe only 10 feet at a time he travelled through the shadows of trees. His plan was on track.

He did as he was told, like a good boy, and warned the others of the archer’s but he did not stay with them nor did he go back to his friends like he was probably supposed to. He wasn’t going against battle plans, no plan for that moment was given to him so he went with his own.

In truth he had no clue where he was going, he just followed the beat that he could hear no matter where he was, the breath he would feel on himself even in death. The shadows done the work, they took him where he needed to go and in no time he found himself in front of a startled Will Solace along with his brothers and sisters with their bows strung. They were the ones who attacked.

An innocent arrow buried itself into the tree beside him.

“Hold your god damn fire!” Will yelled and marched over to Nico with a look of anger and a whole speech of concern and doctors’ orders fresh on his tongue.

“Hold him captive?” A voice yelled, Nico followed it and watched as a young girl swung her body from the tree, holding herself up by her knees. She was from Ares, he knew that before and it was made ever more obvious by her grin and weapons she cradles like dolls, her face was covered in brown and green paint as was the rest of her body.

“Yeah, we’ll hold him captive” Another voice joined in, sounding positively amused and malicious at the same time. Above him a head popped down from the tree, blond curls and grey eyes stared at him, he screamed of course which pleased Annabeth.

“We’ll do more than hold him captive for just tonight!” Will decided as he stood in front of him, Annabeth pulled her head up again and jumped down from the tree in on fluent and swift motion.

“You’d love to hold him captive wouldn’t you Will” A voice yelled from the tree’s followed by a few cat calls in different directions.

“Shut up!” Yelled a red-faced Will. “I only mean for health and safety, since I specifically gave you orders of NO shadow travel whatsoever!” His eyes where building up a storm but he was never fully angry at Nico the sun was always there.

“It was part of my plan” Nico mumbled, no feeling nervous about his plan and ready to chicken out of it. The Apollo cabin stared at him, some with arrows at the read, some with lazy stance but all with curiosity, who knew how many campers were in the trees, how many cabins where hiding, they really went all out.

“What plan…” Will asked inquisitively and squinted his eyes.

Before he could talk himself out of it or before an arrow would come at him he stepped forwards, put his hands on Will’s cheeks, grabbing, and pulled him closer before pressing their lips together.

“Nico?” Two voices collectively yelled, Percy and Jason.

“Nico’s looks a little caught up right now” He heard the voice of Piper laugh.

Will had gotten over his shock and wrapped an arm around Nico’s waist and squeezed him closer before letting him go, the two boys separated but there hands still laced together.

Nico’s team members and the opposing team members held their weapons and shields not knowing if they should attack defend or just gape.

“I think they upstaged us” Percy told Annabeth with a laugh.

“Um…I don’t know what to do anymore” Clarisse awkwardly drawled as she stood in front of the tree she had been waiting in with a sword in front of her digging into the mud.

“We should uphold the tradition” Connor grinned at Travis.

“We definitely should” Annabeth told them with a smile, Percy tapping her and asking what they meant. Nico had a feeling he knew what they meant.

“I don’t think we should” Will shook his head, but before he could defend himself he was picked up by a few of his siblings, wriggling and yelping.

Jason, Percy and the Stoll Brothers all grabbed onto Nico and lifted him into the air, he could have fought, he could of ran, but he didn’t. He had ran out of reasons to run now, ran out of reasons to be scared, to hate himself, to not be himself.

They through Will into the water first, then Nico right behind him, they found each other, gripped onto each other and laughed with one another. His laugh warmed him from inside out and it took away all the anxiety he had felt about his plan. The campers watched them, joined in with their laughter for a few minutes before jumping in after them. Capture the flag was over, kids playing in the water together was just beginning.

Percy used his powers to soak the Aphrodite girls trying to keep their hair dry and Piper convinced them jump in and have fun with them all, there wasn’t much room to swim about but it didn’t matter to Nico, he’d had enough room his whole life and welcome suffocation by love and fun.

Will pounced on him, toppling them both under water where they wrestled until they needed air, they continued their play fight and as he looked at him he realised he had ran out of reasons to not love Will Solace.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Its been a long time with this fic and it didn't exactly go where I wanted it to do and it kinda ended on a whim but if I'm using my own experience here, selfharm does end when you least expect it.  
> I know a lot of people will be disappointed with the sudden ending but it's how I wish it to end.  
> I have a few one shots planned and another multi-chapter I'm planning so look out for that.   
> Thank you for all the Kudos and the comments they mean so much to me.  
> Stay safe fellow demigods! x


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